Friday, June 15, 2018
The Return of Kendrah
My Dearest Corwynne,
I'm sure you know, that I have been gone for a very long time. As I struggled to return to my home in the Settlement, I will admit that I was disappointed to find no missing posters in the public spaces of the towns I passed through, pleading for my return. It has been eight years, so I could easily understand that the massive push to find me had likely died down, but alas, when I spoke with local Stewards and Sheriffs, I found they had no memory of there being a push of any kind. At the end of my journey, I found a rundown and almost deserted settlement. It seems that when I secretly thought the entire endeavor would be lost without me, I was right.
I found my home to be in a sorry state. The layer of dirt on everything managed to keep me from noticing Legolas in his place of woe on the hearth for almost an hour. It has taken several days to assure Leggs that I am real...or as real as I can be...that I had not simply decided not to return after Pennsic, lo those many years ago, and that I had no intention of staying away again. I have yet to tell him the truth of what happened as he has had a difficult couple of days, and to be completely honest, I'm a bit tired myself, but I will sum it up for you.
The trip home from Pennsic was going as it normally does, hot, tired and in need of a shower, I was driving home when suddenly a band of Warg Riders was upon us. I have struggled to put it all together since, but it is mostly a blur. Suffice of to say, I was taken to the edge of Mordor with the last of the servants of the Sauron. Warg Riders, it turns out, aren't the brightest beacon fires on the mountain..they assumed the power and gold they wanted in exchange for my safe return would just be given to them. They had never heard of a ransom note.
Over time, they slowly gave up waiting and eventually they each wandered away. Anticlimactic, I know. Once I freed myself from my cell, I began the long trip home. I am pleased to see that many of our settlements have turned into thriving towns, some on the verge of becoming cities. I am also selfishly glad that everyone assumed I left on my own and hadn't left me to rot.
So, what's new with you?
Your affectionate friend,
Kendrah
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Pennsic Prep
My Dearest Kendrah,
Once again reality has kept me from spending as much time as I would like visiting the White City and surrounding Settlements. I’m pretty sure that’s why I’m so darn cranky. All reality and no imagination makes Corwynne a grumpy girl. The King seems to be taking it in stride. At least I’m still fulfilling all of my official duties, so Faramir has no complaints.
It has been a whirlwind of Pennsic preparations here and in Minas Tirith. Sam (my brother, not the Hobbit) just took a Jeep load of my gear home with him. Faramir and the King have been busy making sure all is ready for the King’s two week absence from the City. People get all tense when the King disappears for long periods of time. I think they’re still a bit sensitive after all those years without one. Not sure yet if the King is attending Land Grab or coming up later. He wanted to come up early, but he’s doesn’t think people will be drunk enough on set up day to interact with him and not sure if he’ll feel comfortable being invisible to, well, almost everyone but you. Has Leggs confided his Pennsic plans to you? If he’s there, I’m sure the King would feel better about it. The Sons (Elrond’s not yours) are planning to stop by for a bit, possibly for the wine tasting. They aren’t as snobby about their booze as their ada is, so I think they’d enjoy it.
Still have quite a bit of sewing to get done. I suppose I should pack it up and ship it off to the Royal Seamstresses, but that seems a bit like cheating. At least I don’t have to worry about garbing the King. I saw him furtively stuffing his old green shirt into a rucksack so expect to see that old rag make another appearance. He has all sorts of lovely court garb he could bring, but no, he digs out his old Ranger stuff and lets his beard get all scruffy. You can take the Ranger out of the Wilds but you can’t take the Wilds out of the Ranger. It’s probably for the better. The last thing we need is an Historical Accuracy Nazi accusing him of engaging in fantasy role playing!
Well, I’m off to sew and tidy up a bit. The King is stopping over later to watch the season finale of Doctor Who. He enjoys it much more without David Tennant. Sigh…sometimes I miss my TV boyfriend, but I will content myself with the King and my new podcast boyfriends.
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
Once again reality has kept me from spending as much time as I would like visiting the White City and surrounding Settlements. I’m pretty sure that’s why I’m so darn cranky. All reality and no imagination makes Corwynne a grumpy girl. The King seems to be taking it in stride. At least I’m still fulfilling all of my official duties, so Faramir has no complaints.
It has been a whirlwind of Pennsic preparations here and in Minas Tirith. Sam (my brother, not the Hobbit) just took a Jeep load of my gear home with him. Faramir and the King have been busy making sure all is ready for the King’s two week absence from the City. People get all tense when the King disappears for long periods of time. I think they’re still a bit sensitive after all those years without one. Not sure yet if the King is attending Land Grab or coming up later. He wanted to come up early, but he’s doesn’t think people will be drunk enough on set up day to interact with him and not sure if he’ll feel comfortable being invisible to, well, almost everyone but you. Has Leggs confided his Pennsic plans to you? If he’s there, I’m sure the King would feel better about it. The Sons (Elrond’s not yours) are planning to stop by for a bit, possibly for the wine tasting. They aren’t as snobby about their booze as their ada is, so I think they’d enjoy it.
Still have quite a bit of sewing to get done. I suppose I should pack it up and ship it off to the Royal Seamstresses, but that seems a bit like cheating. At least I don’t have to worry about garbing the King. I saw him furtively stuffing his old green shirt into a rucksack so expect to see that old rag make another appearance. He has all sorts of lovely court garb he could bring, but no, he digs out his old Ranger stuff and lets his beard get all scruffy. You can take the Ranger out of the Wilds but you can’t take the Wilds out of the Ranger. It’s probably for the better. The last thing we need is an Historical Accuracy Nazi accusing him of engaging in fantasy role playing!
Well, I’m off to sew and tidy up a bit. The King is stopping over later to watch the season finale of Doctor Who. He enjoys it much more without David Tennant. Sigh…sometimes I miss my TV boyfriend, but I will content myself with the King and my new podcast boyfriends.
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
Saturday, May 15, 2010
What ever happened to our Write Ethic
My Dearest Corwynne,
It has, again, been so long. There is no reason for it other than lethargy. The winter weather led Leggs and me into a routine, which is a good and stable thing for the Sons, but leaves little to write about. We spent an equal amount of time here muddling through our daily lives and in the Settlement helping others do the same. Luckily, most of the winter was spring in the Settlement which I think has something to do with why my part of the real world managed to miss snowpocolyse but I have no scientific data to prove it.
Now that spring is slowly working it's way into our part of the world, Leggs is again taken with the tries and the groundhog in the backyard and we are spending more time here. We will both be in attendance at War Practice with no scheduled trips to the Settlement...so barring yet another stone vs tree debate in the Settlement, we should be fine.
Sadly, I have nothing else to report. Hopefully, War Practice will give us much to write about over the coming months.
Your affectionate friend,
Kendrah
It has, again, been so long. There is no reason for it other than lethargy. The winter weather led Leggs and me into a routine, which is a good and stable thing for the Sons, but leaves little to write about. We spent an equal amount of time here muddling through our daily lives and in the Settlement helping others do the same. Luckily, most of the winter was spring in the Settlement which I think has something to do with why my part of the real world managed to miss snowpocolyse but I have no scientific data to prove it.
Now that spring is slowly working it's way into our part of the world, Leggs is again taken with the tries and the groundhog in the backyard and we are spending more time here. We will both be in attendance at War Practice with no scheduled trips to the Settlement...so barring yet another stone vs tree debate in the Settlement, we should be fine.
Sadly, I have nothing else to report. Hopefully, War Practice will give us much to write about over the coming months.
Your affectionate friend,
Kendrah
Sunday, February 21, 2010
In Conclusion
My Dearest Kendrah,
Snowpocalypse has done its worst and after three days of cancelled classes, I had to return to my day job. Apologies for the delay in concluding my story.
Eventually the glory days of Pennsic ended and the King and I had to return to our duties in the White City. I never thought I’d say it, but Faramir deserves a promotion (or a new land grant or a nice war steed, or something!) By the time we returned he had managed to work everything out and things were returning to normal.
Faramir bravely overcame his superstitious dread and began a secret correspondence with Celeborn, putting forth our case.. In a rare moment of Book-Celeborn behavior, he put his foot down as head the household. He summoned Elrond, Thranduil and the “ladies” to a private Elf-Prince Counsel where “many matters of import” were discussed. From what I can tell it involved a stern lecture on the importance of proper behavior, a call for the return to more Novel-not Movie-like behavior, a reminder that Eldar are not Men and should not sink to their level (I think I’m a teensy bit insulted by that) and possibly a threat or two about white ships.
Once he saw which ways the gulls were flying, Thranduril sided with Celebron (suck-up). He’s a soft spot for the King ever since the whole Gollum affair. Elrond nodded a lot and said it was impossible to argue with the wisdom of Celeborn and wouldn’t it be better if we all just got along.
Celebron’s little family meeting worked. When they relised the three Elf-lords wouldn’t support their casue, Arwen and Gladders dropped the suit. Arwen slunk off to Imladris where I understand she’s been sulking in bowers embroidering unflattering tapestries depicting Celeborn’s side of the family. Elrond’s a bit ticked that Celeborn got all up on his high horse, but he seems pleased that his daughter is back where he can keep an eye on her. (he never really liked that she spent so much time with her grandmother) Rumor has it he’s trying to hook up Erestor and Arwen, but Erestor seems a bit resistant (can’t imagine why!)
Celeborn has been spending a great deal of time in the White City hanging out with the Sons (who want to be nowhere near Arwen at the moment) and bonding with Faramir. They became quite good friends during the affair. Faramir loves have a real live Elf King to discuss history with and Celeborn is delighted to spend time with someone who actually listens to him. Publically, Celeborn has declared that his visit is intended to increase Elf-Man understanding, but from the rumors I’ve heard he’s fled the Wood to avoid the wroth of Gladders. Doesn’t matter really, we’ve all been enjoying his company immensely.
So, things are back to normal. The servants are growing accustomed to the unusually large number of Elven nobility in the castle, the King is spending less time hunting (hiding!) in the mountains and even Eowyn and I are getting along. Once again the imaginary world is a comfortable escape from reality. Alas, this will pass as all things must, but for now I am enjoying the relative peace and quiet.
So that’s that. I do hope to hear from you soon. It’s been ages (not literally) since we’ve corresponded and I’ve missed our little letters!
Your Affectionate friend,
Corwynne
Snowpocalypse has done its worst and after three days of cancelled classes, I had to return to my day job. Apologies for the delay in concluding my story.
Eventually the glory days of Pennsic ended and the King and I had to return to our duties in the White City. I never thought I’d say it, but Faramir deserves a promotion (or a new land grant or a nice war steed, or something!) By the time we returned he had managed to work everything out and things were returning to normal.
Faramir bravely overcame his superstitious dread and began a secret correspondence with Celeborn, putting forth our case.. In a rare moment of Book-Celeborn behavior, he put his foot down as head the household. He summoned Elrond, Thranduil and the “ladies” to a private Elf-Prince Counsel where “many matters of import” were discussed. From what I can tell it involved a stern lecture on the importance of proper behavior, a call for the return to more Novel-not Movie-like behavior, a reminder that Eldar are not Men and should not sink to their level (I think I’m a teensy bit insulted by that) and possibly a threat or two about white ships.
Once he saw which ways the gulls were flying, Thranduril sided with Celebron (suck-up). He’s a soft spot for the King ever since the whole Gollum affair. Elrond nodded a lot and said it was impossible to argue with the wisdom of Celeborn and wouldn’t it be better if we all just got along.
Celebron’s little family meeting worked. When they relised the three Elf-lords wouldn’t support their casue, Arwen and Gladders dropped the suit. Arwen slunk off to Imladris where I understand she’s been sulking in bowers embroidering unflattering tapestries depicting Celeborn’s side of the family. Elrond’s a bit ticked that Celeborn got all up on his high horse, but he seems pleased that his daughter is back where he can keep an eye on her. (he never really liked that she spent so much time with her grandmother) Rumor has it he’s trying to hook up Erestor and Arwen, but Erestor seems a bit resistant (can’t imagine why!)
Celeborn has been spending a great deal of time in the White City hanging out with the Sons (who want to be nowhere near Arwen at the moment) and bonding with Faramir. They became quite good friends during the affair. Faramir loves have a real live Elf King to discuss history with and Celeborn is delighted to spend time with someone who actually listens to him. Publically, Celeborn has declared that his visit is intended to increase Elf-Man understanding, but from the rumors I’ve heard he’s fled the Wood to avoid the wroth of Gladders. Doesn’t matter really, we’ve all been enjoying his company immensely.
So, things are back to normal. The servants are growing accustomed to the unusually large number of Elven nobility in the castle, the King is spending less time hunting (hiding!) in the mountains and even Eowyn and I are getting along. Once again the imaginary world is a comfortable escape from reality. Alas, this will pass as all things must, but for now I am enjoying the relative peace and quiet.
So that’s that. I do hope to hear from you soon. It’s been ages (not literally) since we’ve corresponded and I’ve missed our little letters!
Your Affectionate friend,
Corwynne
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
The Saga Continues
My Dearest Kendrah,
I’ve introduced the King to the joys of the electric blanket and he’s currently napping while pretending to read “Sigurd and Gudrun”. I’ve put a nice roast and some veggies in the crockpot. I’m sure he’ll be up for dinner!
Now, where was I?
Oh yes, the lawsuit.
Well, the Sons gave their warning and the King cursed quite a bit (mouth like a Corsair!) and Faramir became the voice of reason. He ordered some mutton and cheese, got everyone to calm down and have something to eat, and rushed back to the Library to research law codes.
Shortly thereafter, a Rider from Rivendell appeared to serve the papers. Seems Arwen is suing me for “Alienation of Affection” and the King for “Cruelty” and blaming me for the entire affair! She demands that he return to her immediately and that I pay a Dwarf’s ransom in restitution. WTF? Suddenly I'm in the middle of a bizarre Masterpiece Theatre period piece! Alienation of affection? Really? What's next? Running across a moor in a rainstorm? Threatening to throw oneself over a cliff? Falling in love with the taciturn butler? We are not amused (that is both the royal We and the first person plural we.)
In true Man fashion, the King suddenly “remembered” a roving band of Orcs harrowing sheep somewhere in the mountains, decided he had to attend to it at once and he and the Sons bolted form the city. Seriously? The guy who walked the Paths of the Dead and fought the Battle of Mt Doom without a helm running away from a piece of paper! Geesh!
Anyway, Faramir emerged from the Tower a few days later, trailed by a flock of pages bearing manuscripts. He had determined that by law and custom, the suit was entirely frivolous. First off, there is no court in Arda that’s going to touch this case. Elrond has decided to remove himself from the situation because his kid is involved (cop-out!), Gladders is named as a co-plaintiff (something a missing family heirloom ) and Thranduil isn’t taking sides. (Seriously, if you were in his position, would you want to get on the wrong side of either of those two?) According to Faramir, Elf courts have no jurisdiction in Gondor, and none of the courts of Men want to deal with Elf-relations. (Divine Right Monarchy does have some benefits)
So Faramir commenced his letter writing campaign to have the case dismissed claiming that since the King and Arwen were never actually married, or even legally betrothed, she should just get over herself and move on. (He was a bit more elegant that). In the mean time, the King is off Orc hunting, I spend weeks shouting “No Comment” to anyone who looks at me funny AND I still have to pack for Pennsic. Faramir assured me that he would handle the situation and that I should, perhaps, take a vacation in the Real World while he sorts it all out. (Fortunately the restraining order preventing Arwen from crossing into my reality is still in effect)
So off I go to Pennsic (which is only mostly the Real World) and proceed to drink a great deal of Hop Wallup. As you know, the King eventually returned from his Orc Hunt and joined me. He had a lovely time (Oh, blessed restraining order!). He really enjoyed the party in camp and the wine tasting, especially the drunken puppy pile of well dressed ladies ;-) We were disappointed that the Sons didn’t join us, but they hung out with Faramir and let Eowyn fawn on them.
He was really amused by Saints Brook and Cam as they “escorted” the drunken Eric around the lake (retarded monkeys painted that!). He hopes that they will be able to join him at the next Ranger Reunion for some “real” drinking. I don’t even want to think about it. (I doubt Deana does either.)
He was quite pleased at some of the plans we made for camp improvements. He has quite a few suggestions. He’s also looking forward to a new pavilion and to baking bread in the stone oven (who knew he’d go all domestic?) He was also impressed by your individually wrapped dinner packets. He’s planning to introduce aluminum foil to the Rangers (though it does smack a bit of “technology” and everyone’s still a bit shy of that since the Saruman incident). Oh, and he wanted me to ask you if he can stay with us in our big girl tent this coming year. I told him it would be fine as long as he didn’t leave his leathers lying all over the place, but he wanted to make sure you were ok with it.
Anyway, Pennsic was a welcome relief from the pressure of the lawsuit and the nagging of Elven females and we both enjoyed our vacation.
Argh! The King needs me to get the Roku working for him. He’s in the middle of watching Fraggle Rock and trying to determine if Fraggles are in anyway related to Hobbits. He thinks there might be a paper in it. Everyone needs a hobby!
Well, I’m going to deal with that. I’ll fill you in on the rest of story as soon as I can.
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
I’ve introduced the King to the joys of the electric blanket and he’s currently napping while pretending to read “Sigurd and Gudrun”. I’ve put a nice roast and some veggies in the crockpot. I’m sure he’ll be up for dinner!
Now, where was I?
Oh yes, the lawsuit.
Well, the Sons gave their warning and the King cursed quite a bit (mouth like a Corsair!) and Faramir became the voice of reason. He ordered some mutton and cheese, got everyone to calm down and have something to eat, and rushed back to the Library to research law codes.
Shortly thereafter, a Rider from Rivendell appeared to serve the papers. Seems Arwen is suing me for “Alienation of Affection” and the King for “Cruelty” and blaming me for the entire affair! She demands that he return to her immediately and that I pay a Dwarf’s ransom in restitution. WTF? Suddenly I'm in the middle of a bizarre Masterpiece Theatre period piece! Alienation of affection? Really? What's next? Running across a moor in a rainstorm? Threatening to throw oneself over a cliff? Falling in love with the taciturn butler? We are not amused (that is both the royal We and the first person plural we.)
In true Man fashion, the King suddenly “remembered” a roving band of Orcs harrowing sheep somewhere in the mountains, decided he had to attend to it at once and he and the Sons bolted form the city. Seriously? The guy who walked the Paths of the Dead and fought the Battle of Mt Doom without a helm running away from a piece of paper! Geesh!
Anyway, Faramir emerged from the Tower a few days later, trailed by a flock of pages bearing manuscripts. He had determined that by law and custom, the suit was entirely frivolous. First off, there is no court in Arda that’s going to touch this case. Elrond has decided to remove himself from the situation because his kid is involved (cop-out!), Gladders is named as a co-plaintiff (something a missing family heirloom ) and Thranduil isn’t taking sides. (Seriously, if you were in his position, would you want to get on the wrong side of either of those two?) According to Faramir, Elf courts have no jurisdiction in Gondor, and none of the courts of Men want to deal with Elf-relations. (Divine Right Monarchy does have some benefits)
So Faramir commenced his letter writing campaign to have the case dismissed claiming that since the King and Arwen were never actually married, or even legally betrothed, she should just get over herself and move on. (He was a bit more elegant that). In the mean time, the King is off Orc hunting, I spend weeks shouting “No Comment” to anyone who looks at me funny AND I still have to pack for Pennsic. Faramir assured me that he would handle the situation and that I should, perhaps, take a vacation in the Real World while he sorts it all out. (Fortunately the restraining order preventing Arwen from crossing into my reality is still in effect)
So off I go to Pennsic (which is only mostly the Real World) and proceed to drink a great deal of Hop Wallup. As you know, the King eventually returned from his Orc Hunt and joined me. He had a lovely time (Oh, blessed restraining order!). He really enjoyed the party in camp and the wine tasting, especially the drunken puppy pile of well dressed ladies ;-) We were disappointed that the Sons didn’t join us, but they hung out with Faramir and let Eowyn fawn on them.
He was really amused by Saints Brook and Cam as they “escorted” the drunken Eric around the lake (retarded monkeys painted that!). He hopes that they will be able to join him at the next Ranger Reunion for some “real” drinking. I don’t even want to think about it. (I doubt Deana does either.)
He was quite pleased at some of the plans we made for camp improvements. He has quite a few suggestions. He’s also looking forward to a new pavilion and to baking bread in the stone oven (who knew he’d go all domestic?) He was also impressed by your individually wrapped dinner packets. He’s planning to introduce aluminum foil to the Rangers (though it does smack a bit of “technology” and everyone’s still a bit shy of that since the Saruman incident). Oh, and he wanted me to ask you if he can stay with us in our big girl tent this coming year. I told him it would be fine as long as he didn’t leave his leathers lying all over the place, but he wanted to make sure you were ok with it.
Anyway, Pennsic was a welcome relief from the pressure of the lawsuit and the nagging of Elven females and we both enjoyed our vacation.
Argh! The King needs me to get the Roku working for him. He’s in the middle of watching Fraggle Rock and trying to determine if Fraggles are in anyway related to Hobbits. He thinks there might be a paper in it. Everyone needs a hobby!
Well, I’m going to deal with that. I’ll fill you in on the rest of story as soon as I can.
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
Tuesday, February 09, 2010
Breaking the Silence
My Dearest Kendrah,
Well, it has been a while since I’ve written. As you know, it is the policy of the Crown not to comment on pending legal actions, and so I have had to be quite circumspect in our conversations over the past few months. Now that everything is settled, my representatives have agreed that I can discuss the unfortunate events of the past summer freely. It won’t get me a guest spot on Jon Stewart like South Carolina First Lady Jenny Sanford and her new book, but believe me, the Gondorian tabloids are having a field day!
Let me back up a bit. In the weeks before Pennsic I was, as usual, busy dealing with the end of Pre-College, packing, and cooking, not to mention all those last minute items Faramir always comes up with right before the King and I are about to head off on vacation. I swear he does it deliberately! Anyway, there I am in the Tower Library with the Steward inspecting the new pipe smoking lounge we’ve constructed (far away from ancient, priceless and irreplaceable manuscripts), when we heard a terrible a ruckus in the yard. Up through gates come the Sons (Elladan and Elrohir, not your boys) riding like bats out of Angband!
We bolted down the stairs to find Elrond’s boys in a conversation with the King using some of the most “indelicate” Elven words I’ve ever heard. You haven’t heard swearing until you’ve heard a couple of High Elves cursing like sailors! The King gives us one of those imperial waves of his and Faramir and I follow the three of them into Elessar’s private study (Man-cave). The King calls for ale so I get everyone a drink, get the Son’s out of their cloaks and sitting down and they start in on the story. Now I love a good story and a good Elvish story is even better (Sometimes I have Bilbo moments) but they were talking really fast apparently forgetting that some of us in the room we not native speakers of Sindarin. Eventually, Faramir and I pieced together the saga and it’s not pretty.
It seems that Arwen (the King’s Elf-ex, not the child) had returned from her imposed “rest” in a secure, private facility, and decided to spend the summer with Grandma. Now, we know how Gladders feels about me, so you can imagine the conversations the two of them had. After a few months with the Elf-Witch, Arwen appears in Rivendell and spends several weeks loudly announcing to anyone who would listen that she won’t stand this treatment any longer. She followed the Sons around trying to get them tell her WHY the King broke up her, and when they wouldn’t cough up anything useful, she took whining to any Elf or random Ranger she could find. Rangers are really good at keeping secrets when it comes to Rings and Dark Lords and such, but they love good old-fashioned domestic gossip! You know how rumors get started. The Rivendell press corp has always been very good to me (Thanks to Elrond!), but that trashy rag the Eldar Anor picked up the story. Next thing you know, it’s worse than Brangelina and Jen. Splattered all over the front pages are stories about the poor Elven Princess and how badly she’s been treated by these horrid Men!
The Sons had had enough of her whining and were packing their bags to spend a few years in Mirkwood when they heard the news. It seems Arwen had decided to sue the King and I! Yes, that’s right, SUE! They hurriedly changed their plans and headed for the White City instead to warn us.
Drat! I have to go! The King is shouting something about Snowpocalypse and telling me I need to come and watch the storm warnings on the Palantir Box. Ugh! He probably just needs more coco. I promise to continue my tale soon.
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corrwynne
Well, it has been a while since I’ve written. As you know, it is the policy of the Crown not to comment on pending legal actions, and so I have had to be quite circumspect in our conversations over the past few months. Now that everything is settled, my representatives have agreed that I can discuss the unfortunate events of the past summer freely. It won’t get me a guest spot on Jon Stewart like South Carolina First Lady Jenny Sanford and her new book, but believe me, the Gondorian tabloids are having a field day!
Let me back up a bit. In the weeks before Pennsic I was, as usual, busy dealing with the end of Pre-College, packing, and cooking, not to mention all those last minute items Faramir always comes up with right before the King and I are about to head off on vacation. I swear he does it deliberately! Anyway, there I am in the Tower Library with the Steward inspecting the new pipe smoking lounge we’ve constructed (far away from ancient, priceless and irreplaceable manuscripts), when we heard a terrible a ruckus in the yard. Up through gates come the Sons (Elladan and Elrohir, not your boys) riding like bats out of Angband!
We bolted down the stairs to find Elrond’s boys in a conversation with the King using some of the most “indelicate” Elven words I’ve ever heard. You haven’t heard swearing until you’ve heard a couple of High Elves cursing like sailors! The King gives us one of those imperial waves of his and Faramir and I follow the three of them into Elessar’s private study (Man-cave). The King calls for ale so I get everyone a drink, get the Son’s out of their cloaks and sitting down and they start in on the story. Now I love a good story and a good Elvish story is even better (Sometimes I have Bilbo moments) but they were talking really fast apparently forgetting that some of us in the room we not native speakers of Sindarin. Eventually, Faramir and I pieced together the saga and it’s not pretty.
It seems that Arwen (the King’s Elf-ex, not the child) had returned from her imposed “rest” in a secure, private facility, and decided to spend the summer with Grandma. Now, we know how Gladders feels about me, so you can imagine the conversations the two of them had. After a few months with the Elf-Witch, Arwen appears in Rivendell and spends several weeks loudly announcing to anyone who would listen that she won’t stand this treatment any longer. She followed the Sons around trying to get them tell her WHY the King broke up her, and when they wouldn’t cough up anything useful, she took whining to any Elf or random Ranger she could find. Rangers are really good at keeping secrets when it comes to Rings and Dark Lords and such, but they love good old-fashioned domestic gossip! You know how rumors get started. The Rivendell press corp has always been very good to me (Thanks to Elrond!), but that trashy rag the Eldar Anor picked up the story. Next thing you know, it’s worse than Brangelina and Jen. Splattered all over the front pages are stories about the poor Elven Princess and how badly she’s been treated by these horrid Men!
The Sons had had enough of her whining and were packing their bags to spend a few years in Mirkwood when they heard the news. It seems Arwen had decided to sue the King and I! Yes, that’s right, SUE! They hurriedly changed their plans and headed for the White City instead to warn us.
Drat! I have to go! The King is shouting something about Snowpocalypse and telling me I need to come and watch the storm warnings on the Palantir Box. Ugh! He probably just needs more coco. I promise to continue my tale soon.
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corrwynne
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Readjusting
My Dearest Corwynne,
It has been so long since I have written, but I have a good excuse. Of course, it is all Leggs' fault, although he blames me. Let me explain.
Pennsic was going along, like it does. And we were having a lovely time, when suddenly and without explaination there was a party...IN OUR CAMP! Well, Leggs lost his mind. He knew that we were all saying the the unwritten camp rules no longer were in affect, but he figured that it was all just talk until there was a party...IN OUR CAMP!
In that moment, in Leggs' world up became down, black became white, day night, good bad...you get the idea. He spent the last few days of Pennsic living by no rules. He danced, he sang and acted a fool...and unlike in the past, I have no Legg's definition for these words, the regular definitions apply. It was lovely to see him let loose like that...
Then we came home....and he doesn't understand Vegas rules and thought that this behavior was appropriate here. For example, this morning he was cooking bacon in my kitchen assuming that I would now enjoy bacon, since there are no rules. Oh yeah, and he was naked.
So, as you can see, I have been very busy trying to get Leggs to behave a little better, especially in public. And it has become a full time job.
I hope that you and the King have had a more reasonable adjustment to regular life.
Your affectionate friend,
Kendrah
It has been so long since I have written, but I have a good excuse. Of course, it is all Leggs' fault, although he blames me. Let me explain.
Pennsic was going along, like it does. And we were having a lovely time, when suddenly and without explaination there was a party...IN OUR CAMP! Well, Leggs lost his mind. He knew that we were all saying the the unwritten camp rules no longer were in affect, but he figured that it was all just talk until there was a party...IN OUR CAMP!
In that moment, in Leggs' world up became down, black became white, day night, good bad...you get the idea. He spent the last few days of Pennsic living by no rules. He danced, he sang and acted a fool...and unlike in the past, I have no Legg's definition for these words, the regular definitions apply. It was lovely to see him let loose like that...
Then we came home....and he doesn't understand Vegas rules and thought that this behavior was appropriate here. For example, this morning he was cooking bacon in my kitchen assuming that I would now enjoy bacon, since there are no rules. Oh yeah, and he was naked.
So, as you can see, I have been very busy trying to get Leggs to behave a little better, especially in public. And it has become a full time job.
I hope that you and the King have had a more reasonable adjustment to regular life.
Your affectionate friend,
Kendrah
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Pennsic Preparations
My Dearest Kendrah,
Once again the summer has flown as swiftly as an eagle out of Mordor and I find Pennsic is only a few days away!
The King and I were sorry to hear that your fantasy was once again interrupted by unwelcome intruders from reality. Let us hope your little geek friend has learned his lesson this time and we will not be bothered by him in the future. In the meantime, The King is considering more stringent identity checks for folks visiting ME. What a pain! Like needing a passport to get into Canada! It's a shame that we must so closely guard the borders of imagination.
My summer so far has been relatively peaceful, the usual precollege fun (we just had Family Weekend)and I've been busily making the final audition schedules, revamping the schedule for next year, planning our faculty meeting.
Fortunately, this is the week where not much is happening at work and I'm in "hurry up and wait" mode until folks get me all the information they are supposed to be getting to me! We hates the waiting game! It's not a fun game at all! I'd rather be home sewing! I'm growing alarmed at the piles of cut out but not yet sewn toddler garb in my dining room. I think I'm going to take tomorrow off work and spend some quality time with my Bernina.
Meanwhile, the King has been busy gathering our camping equipment, repairing his SCA legal "weapons" and learning a few new drinking songs to share at the pub. He is really looking forward to War this year and hopes that he and Leggs can spend some quality fellowship time together. Faramir seems delighted that the King plans to be gone for a few weeks. Eowyn has been a bit too flirtatious for out liking recently.
Well, I should go and finish up my reports so I can home and start on the pile of sewing and maybe do some laundry! There's never a gay Orc around when you need one!
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
Once again the summer has flown as swiftly as an eagle out of Mordor and I find Pennsic is only a few days away!
The King and I were sorry to hear that your fantasy was once again interrupted by unwelcome intruders from reality. Let us hope your little geek friend has learned his lesson this time and we will not be bothered by him in the future. In the meantime, The King is considering more stringent identity checks for folks visiting ME. What a pain! Like needing a passport to get into Canada! It's a shame that we must so closely guard the borders of imagination.
My summer so far has been relatively peaceful, the usual precollege fun (we just had Family Weekend)and I've been busily making the final audition schedules, revamping the schedule for next year, planning our faculty meeting.
Fortunately, this is the week where not much is happening at work and I'm in "hurry up and wait" mode until folks get me all the information they are supposed to be getting to me! We hates the waiting game! It's not a fun game at all! I'd rather be home sewing! I'm growing alarmed at the piles of cut out but not yet sewn toddler garb in my dining room. I think I'm going to take tomorrow off work and spend some quality time with my Bernina.
Meanwhile, the King has been busy gathering our camping equipment, repairing his SCA legal "weapons" and learning a few new drinking songs to share at the pub. He is really looking forward to War this year and hopes that he and Leggs can spend some quality fellowship time together. Faramir seems delighted that the King plans to be gone for a few weeks. Eowyn has been a bit too flirtatious for out liking recently.
Well, I should go and finish up my reports so I can home and start on the pile of sewing and maybe do some laundry! There's never a gay Orc around when you need one!
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Interloper
My dearest Corwynne,
I am about to send off my monthly report to the Department of Middle Earth Secruity and I want to write to you at the same time as to avoid any alarm you might feel upon hearing rumors of the settlement coming out of those offices. Be assured that we are all safe and well. Now, on with the tale....
Shortly after returning from war practice I received a message telling me that it would behove me to head to the settlement. Obviously, a message like this peaked my curiosity and I headed on over. When I arrived at the home that Leggs and I share, I found it in great disarray. Of course, I share this home with an elf who can live in the woods for years on end without getting dirty, so when I say great dissarray, I mean the throw pillow on the couch was slightly off center. I immediatley began to search the settlement for Leggs.
After about twenty minutes I found several of the non separatist elvish elders who were willing to tell me what was going on. As I am sure you know already, there is a small faction of the elven leadership who are still hoping that Leggs will come to his senses and kick out all those of non elvish blood from the settlement. Apparently, they had found new energy in the shape of a new leader. Dalbit.
I had been hearing these rumors for a while, reported them, as I am required to do, to the DMES and laughed about them with Leggs. He and I are in no way conserned by these men and what they want because, when it comes right down to it, these lands which hold the settlement we part of the Grant of Arms that Leggs received for his part in the overthrow of the Dark Lord, and he has the right to have them removed whenever they become more dangerous than amusing.
Anyway, the elders told me that while we were away, Dalbit and some of his followers laid in wait at our home. When Leggs returned he was overpowered and was being held at one of the outlying building sites. They were under the impression that Leggs would be released unharmed, if I would go there and promise to remove myself and all non elves from the settlement.
Upon hearing this I headed off to the building site. There I found Leggs bound and gagged in a chair. He was, of course, impecably clean. Dalbit, as his captor, began to tell me the conditions for Leggs' release. It was very lucky that Leggs was paying very close attention to my facial expressions at this time, because at the very moment I began to laugh, he broke free of his bonds and knocked Dalbit unconsicous.
I continued to laugh for quite a while and Leggs dolled out one of his very rare smiles....this one had both sides of his mouth included! He told me that when he arrived home, he recognized Dalbit as Billingdalt aka Billy Dalton, even though he is much older now, and thought that it would be fun to let them take him prisioner until I arrived. I know it sounds like a strange thing to think of as fun, but he was right, it was.
Billy Billingdalt Dalbit Dalton has been banished once again, and the gate guards have new images of him to study so that maybe this time it will be for good. I have included the images in the DMES file so they can do the same in the White City. I don't believe that he is truly dangerous at this time, but they way Leggs keeps kicking his ass, he might get angry enough to become a serious problem.
So that ends that for now. In other news, I attended graduation ceremonies for both of the sons. Preschool and fifth grade are over. The youngest son is currently attending safety town and will graduate from it this weekend. Hopefully that will also be when he stops explaining to me the rules for driving up to a stop sign, because it is cute and also really annoying.
The sons are looking forward to the forbidden fishing trip and can't wait to see you in July, and I have to say that I am with them on that.
Give my best to the King
Your affectionate friend,
Kendrah
I am about to send off my monthly report to the Department of Middle Earth Secruity and I want to write to you at the same time as to avoid any alarm you might feel upon hearing rumors of the settlement coming out of those offices. Be assured that we are all safe and well. Now, on with the tale....
Shortly after returning from war practice I received a message telling me that it would behove me to head to the settlement. Obviously, a message like this peaked my curiosity and I headed on over. When I arrived at the home that Leggs and I share, I found it in great disarray. Of course, I share this home with an elf who can live in the woods for years on end without getting dirty, so when I say great dissarray, I mean the throw pillow on the couch was slightly off center. I immediatley began to search the settlement for Leggs.
After about twenty minutes I found several of the non separatist elvish elders who were willing to tell me what was going on. As I am sure you know already, there is a small faction of the elven leadership who are still hoping that Leggs will come to his senses and kick out all those of non elvish blood from the settlement. Apparently, they had found new energy in the shape of a new leader. Dalbit.
I had been hearing these rumors for a while, reported them, as I am required to do, to the DMES and laughed about them with Leggs. He and I are in no way conserned by these men and what they want because, when it comes right down to it, these lands which hold the settlement we part of the Grant of Arms that Leggs received for his part in the overthrow of the Dark Lord, and he has the right to have them removed whenever they become more dangerous than amusing.
Anyway, the elders told me that while we were away, Dalbit and some of his followers laid in wait at our home. When Leggs returned he was overpowered and was being held at one of the outlying building sites. They were under the impression that Leggs would be released unharmed, if I would go there and promise to remove myself and all non elves from the settlement.
Upon hearing this I headed off to the building site. There I found Leggs bound and gagged in a chair. He was, of course, impecably clean. Dalbit, as his captor, began to tell me the conditions for Leggs' release. It was very lucky that Leggs was paying very close attention to my facial expressions at this time, because at the very moment I began to laugh, he broke free of his bonds and knocked Dalbit unconsicous.
I continued to laugh for quite a while and Leggs dolled out one of his very rare smiles....this one had both sides of his mouth included! He told me that when he arrived home, he recognized Dalbit as Billingdalt aka Billy Dalton, even though he is much older now, and thought that it would be fun to let them take him prisioner until I arrived. I know it sounds like a strange thing to think of as fun, but he was right, it was.
Billy Billingdalt Dalbit Dalton has been banished once again, and the gate guards have new images of him to study so that maybe this time it will be for good. I have included the images in the DMES file so they can do the same in the White City. I don't believe that he is truly dangerous at this time, but they way Leggs keeps kicking his ass, he might get angry enough to become a serious problem.
So that ends that for now. In other news, I attended graduation ceremonies for both of the sons. Preschool and fifth grade are over. The youngest son is currently attending safety town and will graduate from it this weekend. Hopefully that will also be when he stops explaining to me the rules for driving up to a stop sign, because it is cute and also really annoying.
The sons are looking forward to the forbidden fishing trip and can't wait to see you in July, and I have to say that I am with them on that.
Give my best to the King
Your affectionate friend,
Kendrah
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Catching Up
My Dearest Kendrah,
Well, it has been quite month! Please forgive my lack of correspondence. Real world events and travel have severely impacted the amount of time I can spend in Imagination Land (as it is known in South Park).
Let's see...
First there was Beltane, and like any good Senior Druid, I volunteered to organize our auction. That venture took up most of the last week of April. The King pouted, but stayed out of my way as I organized donations, for which I am extremely grateful.
The following week I traveled to Arizona for a festival and the King tagged along. He seemed a bit disappointed that he didn't have to rescue me from a scorpion lurking in my shoe, but he seemed to enjoy himself anyway. He was quite entertained by the various storytellers who presented and got all weepy over his pipe and beer about how sad it is when people forget to pass on the lore of their ancestors.
Fast forward to War Practice which was ever so much more pleasant this year. Best weather in my memory! We didn't have to frighten the children with stories about how we would all die if the fire went out! Good friends, good food, good music. Huzzah to Gardner and his hurdy-gurdy! The King had a great time! He fought a bit, drank a bit more and even stuck around to go fishing with Lassair and the Sons. He was delighted when they caught their fish and wanted to make sure to invite them to our next picnic at Henneth Annun, as the fishing in the Forbidden Pool isn't quite so forbidden since the fall of You Know Who. I think it will be years before I could eat a fish that came from water where Gollum once swam, but that's just me...
I'm glad our PennMoot was so successful. Looks like we all have lots to do in the next two months! EEK! Two months!
Last weekend I was off to Wellspring. The King declined to join me. I think he's still freaked out by topless dancers around the fire from a few years ago. I very cleverly gave the King a copy of the Professor's latest publication, Sigurd and Gudrun, and he holed himself up in the library comparing skaldic poetry forms to the ancient texts of Numenor. I knew a good book would keep him occupied and safely out of Eowyn's...err...harm's way while I was gone.
My journeys for the moment are now ended. I plan to stay at home, reading poetry with the King, sewing and running PreCollege until it's time for Pennsic. I hope all is well with you and yours.
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
Well, it has been quite month! Please forgive my lack of correspondence. Real world events and travel have severely impacted the amount of time I can spend in Imagination Land (as it is known in South Park).
Let's see...
First there was Beltane, and like any good Senior Druid, I volunteered to organize our auction. That venture took up most of the last week of April. The King pouted, but stayed out of my way as I organized donations, for which I am extremely grateful.
The following week I traveled to Arizona for a festival and the King tagged along. He seemed a bit disappointed that he didn't have to rescue me from a scorpion lurking in my shoe, but he seemed to enjoy himself anyway. He was quite entertained by the various storytellers who presented and got all weepy over his pipe and beer about how sad it is when people forget to pass on the lore of their ancestors.
Fast forward to War Practice which was ever so much more pleasant this year. Best weather in my memory! We didn't have to frighten the children with stories about how we would all die if the fire went out! Good friends, good food, good music. Huzzah to Gardner and his hurdy-gurdy! The King had a great time! He fought a bit, drank a bit more and even stuck around to go fishing with Lassair and the Sons. He was delighted when they caught their fish and wanted to make sure to invite them to our next picnic at Henneth Annun, as the fishing in the Forbidden Pool isn't quite so forbidden since the fall of You Know Who. I think it will be years before I could eat a fish that came from water where Gollum once swam, but that's just me...
I'm glad our PennMoot was so successful. Looks like we all have lots to do in the next two months! EEK! Two months!
Last weekend I was off to Wellspring. The King declined to join me. I think he's still freaked out by topless dancers around the fire from a few years ago. I very cleverly gave the King a copy of the Professor's latest publication, Sigurd and Gudrun, and he holed himself up in the library comparing skaldic poetry forms to the ancient texts of Numenor. I knew a good book would keep him occupied and safely out of Eowyn's...err...harm's way while I was gone.
My journeys for the moment are now ended. I plan to stay at home, reading poetry with the King, sewing and running PreCollege until it's time for Pennsic. I hope all is well with you and yours.
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Eons of Silence
My Dearest Corwynne,
I am so sorry for my long silence. The past few months have taken me by surprise in their length and their lack of interesting events. My Great Matter has been solved...sort of. I know that I understand it has ended, however the other part seems to be taking the same stance as the secondary party in the original great matter...I just hope that things do not have a similar ending to the original.
Anyway, on to far more important things...Your Birthday!!! I just came home from your surprise party at the settlement. I am so sorry we had to use a ruse of a crisis with the dwarfs and the new gates for the White City to get you there, but you schedule is very hard to work around. The dress you were wearing does however, lead me to believe that you had an inkling...unless that is the sort of thing the future queen must wear while riding through the countryside on official business, but it seemed to be more of a party dress than a riding dress to us simple folk in the settlement. :)
I hope that you were surprise at least that all the shire folk were able to attend. I was very surprised that Elijah, Dom, Billy, and Sir Ian Sir Ian Sir Ian were there. There was much drama over whether or not they would be able to get the appropriate visa's needed by the Department of Middle Earth Security these days. They seem to be getting more and more strict as each age passes. I don't think the boats from the West could travel back now if they tried!
I am sure you noticed the lack of Orli. Things between him and Leggs are stressed again. And I must admit that I am partly to blame. Me and Ricky Gervais together. You see, I was watching Extras while I was stripping my kitchen floor while the sons were at their father's over Spring Break. Orli is the guest star in one episode and he is "acting" as if he is very self centered and can't believe it is possible for anyone to not find him attractive. He is also very hard on Johnny Depp. Well, Leggs was visiting at the time and he hit the roof.
Apparently, Orli and Leggs had an agreement that Leggs would tolerate him at official functions if he maintained an air of self respect in public. I explained that he was in fact acting in the show, simply doing his job. Leggs feels that just because he is an actor and it was a palantir box show doesn't mean he was acting at all. That Orli had broken their agreement by allowing the masses to see how he truly is. In the end, it was just best not to invite him, and no one seemed to be missing him.
One bit of reality news to share. My great grandfather has been mentioned in yet another book. This one is called In the Wake of the Butcher and amazingly has nothing what ever to do with the mafia! Apparently there was a serial killer in Cleveland in the 40's called the Cleveland Torso Murder and my great grandfather was the police sergeant who found severed head number four. So it looks like my love of the morbid could have been caused by some sort of genetic memory...probably not, but I'm gonna go with that anyway.
Well, with that, I hope you had a good time at the party and that you have a lovely birthday.
Your affectionate friend,
Kendrah
I am so sorry for my long silence. The past few months have taken me by surprise in their length and their lack of interesting events. My Great Matter has been solved...sort of. I know that I understand it has ended, however the other part seems to be taking the same stance as the secondary party in the original great matter...I just hope that things do not have a similar ending to the original.
Anyway, on to far more important things...Your Birthday!!! I just came home from your surprise party at the settlement. I am so sorry we had to use a ruse of a crisis with the dwarfs and the new gates for the White City to get you there, but you schedule is very hard to work around. The dress you were wearing does however, lead me to believe that you had an inkling...unless that is the sort of thing the future queen must wear while riding through the countryside on official business, but it seemed to be more of a party dress than a riding dress to us simple folk in the settlement. :)
I hope that you were surprise at least that all the shire folk were able to attend. I was very surprised that Elijah, Dom, Billy, and Sir Ian Sir Ian Sir Ian were there. There was much drama over whether or not they would be able to get the appropriate visa's needed by the Department of Middle Earth Security these days. They seem to be getting more and more strict as each age passes. I don't think the boats from the West could travel back now if they tried!
I am sure you noticed the lack of Orli. Things between him and Leggs are stressed again. And I must admit that I am partly to blame. Me and Ricky Gervais together. You see, I was watching Extras while I was stripping my kitchen floor while the sons were at their father's over Spring Break. Orli is the guest star in one episode and he is "acting" as if he is very self centered and can't believe it is possible for anyone to not find him attractive. He is also very hard on Johnny Depp. Well, Leggs was visiting at the time and he hit the roof.
Apparently, Orli and Leggs had an agreement that Leggs would tolerate him at official functions if he maintained an air of self respect in public. I explained that he was in fact acting in the show, simply doing his job. Leggs feels that just because he is an actor and it was a palantir box show doesn't mean he was acting at all. That Orli had broken their agreement by allowing the masses to see how he truly is. In the end, it was just best not to invite him, and no one seemed to be missing him.
One bit of reality news to share. My great grandfather has been mentioned in yet another book. This one is called In the Wake of the Butcher and amazingly has nothing what ever to do with the mafia! Apparently there was a serial killer in Cleveland in the 40's called the Cleveland Torso Murder and my great grandfather was the police sergeant who found severed head number four. So it looks like my love of the morbid could have been caused by some sort of genetic memory...probably not, but I'm gonna go with that anyway.
Well, with that, I hope you had a good time at the party and that you have a lovely birthday.
Your affectionate friend,
Kendrah
Friday, February 27, 2009
Christmas in Review
My Dearest Kendrah,
I was sitting here at work waiting for the show to start and remembering the lovely time we had at Christmas on Valentine's Day! I am so glad we were finally able to get together and share Yuletide joy and prezzies! It felt strange making pierogies in February, since they tend to be a December and July project, but I am quite pleased with how well they turned out. and our cake with cherry bits and pink icing was a joy! In fact the King has been pestering me for two weeks to make another one, but I've been so busy at work I just haven't had time. I promised I'd whip up another during spring break if he helps me clean the basement. We'll see how that goes.
I want to than you again for the prezzies. It's wonderful to have a bound collection of our correspondence. I'm sure our letters will quite helpful to historians in future years. I finally got my new little guys out of their boxes and into the china cabinet where they belong and they seem quite content in their new home. I have to remember to bring the giant bag of chocolate into work for the kiddies.
The King was quite impressed with your youngest Son's Orc slaying prowess. He has improved a great deal since the last time he was in my livingroom swinging a sword at the television. We were particularly pleased that has passed the Watcher in the Water level. I hear he has been practicing at home!
I've not see nmuch of the King since you left. He's spending a great deal of time pouting in the White City because I've been working so much. Fortunately, Eowyn is off visiting the Rohirric relatives so I don't have to worry any "comforting" going on! I've promised him that as soon as February ends, we can spend more time together. He's already making plans for War Practice!
Well, I should go balance my end of day reports or something. I hope all is well with you. We should plan to get together soon, maybe in an extra-reality location to avoid the issues of driving long distances!
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
I was sitting here at work waiting for the show to start and remembering the lovely time we had at Christmas on Valentine's Day! I am so glad we were finally able to get together and share Yuletide joy and prezzies! It felt strange making pierogies in February, since they tend to be a December and July project, but I am quite pleased with how well they turned out. and our cake with cherry bits and pink icing was a joy! In fact the King has been pestering me for two weeks to make another one, but I've been so busy at work I just haven't had time. I promised I'd whip up another during spring break if he helps me clean the basement. We'll see how that goes.
I want to than you again for the prezzies. It's wonderful to have a bound collection of our correspondence. I'm sure our letters will quite helpful to historians in future years. I finally got my new little guys out of their boxes and into the china cabinet where they belong and they seem quite content in their new home. I have to remember to bring the giant bag of chocolate into work for the kiddies.
The King was quite impressed with your youngest Son's Orc slaying prowess. He has improved a great deal since the last time he was in my livingroom swinging a sword at the television. We were particularly pleased that has passed the Watcher in the Water level. I hear he has been practicing at home!
I've not see nmuch of the King since you left. He's spending a great deal of time pouting in the White City because I've been working so much. Fortunately, Eowyn is off visiting the Rohirric relatives so I don't have to worry any "comforting" going on! I've promised him that as soon as February ends, we can spend more time together. He's already making plans for War Practice!
Well, I should go balance my end of day reports or something. I hope all is well with you. We should plan to get together soon, maybe in an extra-reality location to avoid the issues of driving long distances!
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Christmas on Valentine's Day
My Dearest Corwynne,
The Sons are so excited at the prospect of spending Valentine's Day opening Christmas presents, that they can hardly contain themselves. And I must admit, that I, too, am looking forward to the trip. If I can just find a way to pick up the rental car....
You see, much has happened here as well. Some of it cannot be put into this letter, for it might fall into the wrong hands and I have not made up my mind completely yet. But Leggs is over the moon with hope and has begun the "dwell with me" chant again. Luckily it is a muttering type of chant this time so I tune it out along with The Imagination Movers and Dora the Explorer. Time will tell what will come of "My Great Matter" and I will fill you in, in full when I can.
In news that can be freely sent into the world, the Jeep has died. And I will explain it's fate as I did for Leggs. The Jeep has fallen. The grief is near, but far enough to discuss. It is like Gandalf the Grey in Mordor. It is possible with enough faith (for our discussion faith=money) it will return like Gandalf the White....so go sing a lament.
He accepted this and is now so busy, what with the chanting and lamenting that I have had several days of peace and quiet. He hopes that he will be recovered by the weekend because he is fascinated at how a celebration of a holy day can be randomly shifted by two months and can not wait to study it.
In still other news of my woe. On the day of the Jeep's death I also lost my dryer. Perhaps the dryer and the Jeep were having an affair and the one could not go on with out the other...perhaps not. Either way, I have no dryer and no car with which to get to one. Strange how clean socks can suddenly become so precious.
I wish I had things to write that were full of mirth, and perhaps one day I will, but this is not that day. But we are holding up admirably considering. One might even mistake us for British if they didn't listen to us talk. We shall overcome our woes and I am sure that this weekend will go a long way towards that goal.
See you soon,
You affectionate friend,
Kendrah
The Sons are so excited at the prospect of spending Valentine's Day opening Christmas presents, that they can hardly contain themselves. And I must admit, that I, too, am looking forward to the trip. If I can just find a way to pick up the rental car....
You see, much has happened here as well. Some of it cannot be put into this letter, for it might fall into the wrong hands and I have not made up my mind completely yet. But Leggs is over the moon with hope and has begun the "dwell with me" chant again. Luckily it is a muttering type of chant this time so I tune it out along with The Imagination Movers and Dora the Explorer. Time will tell what will come of "My Great Matter" and I will fill you in, in full when I can.
In news that can be freely sent into the world, the Jeep has died. And I will explain it's fate as I did for Leggs. The Jeep has fallen. The grief is near, but far enough to discuss. It is like Gandalf the Grey in Mordor. It is possible with enough faith (for our discussion faith=money) it will return like Gandalf the White....so go sing a lament.
He accepted this and is now so busy, what with the chanting and lamenting that I have had several days of peace and quiet. He hopes that he will be recovered by the weekend because he is fascinated at how a celebration of a holy day can be randomly shifted by two months and can not wait to study it.
In still other news of my woe. On the day of the Jeep's death I also lost my dryer. Perhaps the dryer and the Jeep were having an affair and the one could not go on with out the other...perhaps not. Either way, I have no dryer and no car with which to get to one. Strange how clean socks can suddenly become so precious.
I wish I had things to write that were full of mirth, and perhaps one day I will, but this is not that day. But we are holding up admirably considering. One might even mistake us for British if they didn't listen to us talk. We shall overcome our woes and I am sure that this weekend will go a long way towards that goal.
See you soon,
You affectionate friend,
Kendrah
Monday, January 26, 2009
Catching Up
My Dearest Kendrah,
Well, time certainly has flown and much has transpired since last I wrote.
First off, the King and are were deeply disappointed that you and the Sons did not make in for New Year's RR (Reality Reckoning) this season. Curse the slippery roads that caused your accident and the fateful damage to your Jeep's under-carriage! The King muttered darkly about the storms at Caradhras and fell voices on the air, but I was able to assure him (I think, anyway) that not all ill-fortunes are are contrived by evil and unfriendly things and it that is was simply an accident. We were both relieved that you were not injured.
Sam (my brother, not the Hobbit) and I had a lovely time in North Carolina. Mostly I held little Vivian, changed diapers and fed her whenever possible. As you know, two week old babies are just fun to cuddle...it's those sneaky hormones!!! My sister in law and I had fun dressing her up in all of her "Baby's First Christmas" outfits. It was most enjoyable just sitting around watching movies, looking at old family photos and chatting. The King decided against joining us. He thought that Chris and Yvonne would have their full without the introduction of an imaginary boyfriend, so he spent the holidays with Eomer. The Rohirrim always throw the best Yule parties.
Since you were unable to join us for New Year's Eve, I went to my friend Alaric's for eating, drinking and watching the ball drop. It was a lovely time. Unfortunately I woke up the next morning with a sore throat and stuffy head. I thought all was well and it was a simple cold until two days later when it was determined I did indeed have a horrible case of the Plague (or at least a nasty, nasty, flu)
The King, having determined years ago that his "healing hands" are most effective on diseases caused by the fell breath of the Dark Lord, decided he would be better off returning to the White City and not risking his royal health with a Reality Plague. He was probably right. Eru knows what effect one of our plagues might have on the native populations of ME! Since I was sleeping about 20 hours a day, waking only to drink tea or have some soup, I didn't miss him too much. I am glad to say I am now mostly recovered, but this particular plague has quite the staying power!
Work has already been busy this semester, with an opera last weekend, Playground this weekend, and a pile of shows opening the week after.February is quite a busy month for me, but March will slow down a bit before the end of term craziness of April.
The King and I are looking forward to your visit in February. The unopened gifts in my living room look so sad and lonely! The King is planning to stop our bardic circle that Friday night, and hope you can make it too. Did you realize the weekend we chose for our late-Christmas was Valentine's Day? Maybe I'll make a pink or something to add to the festivities. The King doesn't much go in for Valentine's Day, but the Sons might enjoy a holiday theme.
Well, I must be off. Looking forward to seeing you soon!
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
Well, time certainly has flown and much has transpired since last I wrote.
First off, the King and are were deeply disappointed that you and the Sons did not make in for New Year's RR (Reality Reckoning) this season. Curse the slippery roads that caused your accident and the fateful damage to your Jeep's under-carriage! The King muttered darkly about the storms at Caradhras and fell voices on the air, but I was able to assure him (I think, anyway) that not all ill-fortunes are are contrived by evil and unfriendly things and it that is was simply an accident. We were both relieved that you were not injured.
Sam (my brother, not the Hobbit) and I had a lovely time in North Carolina. Mostly I held little Vivian, changed diapers and fed her whenever possible. As you know, two week old babies are just fun to cuddle...it's those sneaky hormones!!! My sister in law and I had fun dressing her up in all of her "Baby's First Christmas" outfits. It was most enjoyable just sitting around watching movies, looking at old family photos and chatting. The King decided against joining us. He thought that Chris and Yvonne would have their full without the introduction of an imaginary boyfriend, so he spent the holidays with Eomer. The Rohirrim always throw the best Yule parties.
Since you were unable to join us for New Year's Eve, I went to my friend Alaric's for eating, drinking and watching the ball drop. It was a lovely time. Unfortunately I woke up the next morning with a sore throat and stuffy head. I thought all was well and it was a simple cold until two days later when it was determined I did indeed have a horrible case of the Plague (or at least a nasty, nasty, flu)
The King, having determined years ago that his "healing hands" are most effective on diseases caused by the fell breath of the Dark Lord, decided he would be better off returning to the White City and not risking his royal health with a Reality Plague. He was probably right. Eru knows what effect one of our plagues might have on the native populations of ME! Since I was sleeping about 20 hours a day, waking only to drink tea or have some soup, I didn't miss him too much. I am glad to say I am now mostly recovered, but this particular plague has quite the staying power!
Work has already been busy this semester, with an opera last weekend, Playground this weekend, and a pile of shows opening the week after.February is quite a busy month for me, but March will slow down a bit before the end of term craziness of April.
The King and I are looking forward to your visit in February. The unopened gifts in my living room look so sad and lonely! The King is planning to stop our bardic circle that Friday night, and hope you can make it too. Did you realize the weekend we chose for our late-Christmas was Valentine's Day? Maybe I'll make a pink or something to add to the festivities. The King doesn't much go in for Valentine's Day, but the Sons might enjoy a holiday theme.
Well, I must be off. Looking forward to seeing you soon!
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Christmas
My dearest Corywnne,
Merry Christmas! It was quite a morning here. The ex was here for the festivities as he is each year, but this year Leggs was far more perturbed about it. He understands that it is best for the children that we do the "celebrate of the birth of the child that doesn't exist" together, or at least he says he does. His actions do not bare that out.
The ex goes into the kitchen to refill his coffee and Leggs is right there behind him, I opted to stay in the living room. So Leggs begins yelling out each thing he touches.
"He's opening the silverware drawer!"
"Now he is messing with the glasses!!"
"He's washing the french press, and you just know he won't empty the sink catch!!!"
He was right of course, but I hardly think it was worthy of a running commentary...unless it included Dom and Billy...cause then I am sure it would have been amusing.
Anyway, the children were very pleased with their gifts from "the red-suited pipe smoking man who doesn't exist", and are off to spend the weekend with their father. I am off for a nap before the settlements first annual (gods help me)red-suited man party. I wish the would consult me, even when they are trying to surprise me.
Hope you are enjoying North Carolina and the new baby.
Your affectionate friend,
Kendrah
Merry Christmas! It was quite a morning here. The ex was here for the festivities as he is each year, but this year Leggs was far more perturbed about it. He understands that it is best for the children that we do the "celebrate of the birth of the child that doesn't exist" together, or at least he says he does. His actions do not bare that out.
The ex goes into the kitchen to refill his coffee and Leggs is right there behind him, I opted to stay in the living room. So Leggs begins yelling out each thing he touches.
"He's opening the silverware drawer!"
"Now he is messing with the glasses!!"
"He's washing the french press, and you just know he won't empty the sink catch!!!"
He was right of course, but I hardly think it was worthy of a running commentary...unless it included Dom and Billy...cause then I am sure it would have been amusing.
Anyway, the children were very pleased with their gifts from "the red-suited pipe smoking man who doesn't exist", and are off to spend the weekend with their father. I am off for a nap before the settlements first annual (gods help me)red-suited man party. I wish the would consult me, even when they are trying to surprise me.
Hope you are enjoying North Carolina and the new baby.
Your affectionate friend,
Kendrah
Monday, December 15, 2008
Fa la la la la
My Dearest Kendrah,
The King and were both terribly shocked and concerned to hear about Cam. I was glad to see his post on the Pennsic group. He seems to be in good spirits and we hope, well on his way to recovery. The King does not seem to have the same issues Leggs does when dealing with human illness. Quite the opposite. He usually launches into a melancholy speech about the frailty of Men and how much better things were in Numenor of Old. I tell him that's what happens when your mythic ancestors start worshippping the Dark Lord and then he gets kinda cranky. He consoles himself with a pipe (no egg or pickle), a glass of good scotch and some lament singing. Lament singing always cheers him up!!
In other news, you probably know by now that my brother's wife had her baby! The King feels we should consult a wizard on her destiny because of all the 11s and 7s at her birth, December 11, 11:07 am, 7 lbs, 7 oz. He finds it most strange that she is named for my mother and was born on my mother's birthday, 11 years after my mother passed away. He is certain this is an auspicious birth and is trying to get her on the waiting list for the famed Imladris PreSchool program. (apparently the list is VERY long.) He can't wait to meet her! Unfortunately, I don't know if my brother's wife is aware of our relationship. I suggested that he give me a day or two to get her comfortable with the idea of a non-reality brother-in-law before he pops in, arms laden with Yule gifts and siging Elvish lullabyes. He was a little miffed that I hadn't shared our relationship with my new sister-in-law, but I explained that they live in a far away land called North Carolina and that I have not met her yet myself. He agreed that informing one's family about an non-reality boyfriend (especially a royal one) is something that is best done face to face.
In other news, I'm busily shopping and preparing for the North Carolina trip. I think my shopping is finally complete, now all that's left is wrapping. I'm hoping the King will stick around and amuse the cats with bits of tinsel and jolly games of Trip the Ranger Down the basement stairs so I can rustle wrapping paper without fear, but you know how unhelpful he can be when there's work to be done. Still, it's shaping up to be a productive evening.
The Kings snuck off to do his Yule shopping on Saturday while Deana and I slaved away at cookie baking. Deana added a new treat to the cookie marathon this year...chocolate covered oreos! They are delightful! I let the King eat the broken ones, cuz that's the kind of sweetie I am :-)
We are very much looking forward to visiting with you and the Sons this holiday and hope to see Tom and Bill as well. We can make more concrete plans (as "concrete" as our "plans" ever are!) closer to your arrival.
Well, I must begin the wrapping...the sooner begun, the sooner done, or something like that. Perhaps I should get Bilbo to invent a new Old Saying for situations of this type. I do hope your cold is better and you are not too snowbound!
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
The King and were both terribly shocked and concerned to hear about Cam. I was glad to see his post on the Pennsic group. He seems to be in good spirits and we hope, well on his way to recovery. The King does not seem to have the same issues Leggs does when dealing with human illness. Quite the opposite. He usually launches into a melancholy speech about the frailty of Men and how much better things were in Numenor of Old. I tell him that's what happens when your mythic ancestors start worshippping the Dark Lord and then he gets kinda cranky. He consoles himself with a pipe (no egg or pickle), a glass of good scotch and some lament singing. Lament singing always cheers him up!!
In other news, you probably know by now that my brother's wife had her baby! The King feels we should consult a wizard on her destiny because of all the 11s and 7s at her birth, December 11, 11:07 am, 7 lbs, 7 oz. He finds it most strange that she is named for my mother and was born on my mother's birthday, 11 years after my mother passed away. He is certain this is an auspicious birth and is trying to get her on the waiting list for the famed Imladris PreSchool program. (apparently the list is VERY long.) He can't wait to meet her! Unfortunately, I don't know if my brother's wife is aware of our relationship. I suggested that he give me a day or two to get her comfortable with the idea of a non-reality brother-in-law before he pops in, arms laden with Yule gifts and siging Elvish lullabyes. He was a little miffed that I hadn't shared our relationship with my new sister-in-law, but I explained that they live in a far away land called North Carolina and that I have not met her yet myself. He agreed that informing one's family about an non-reality boyfriend (especially a royal one) is something that is best done face to face.
In other news, I'm busily shopping and preparing for the North Carolina trip. I think my shopping is finally complete, now all that's left is wrapping. I'm hoping the King will stick around and amuse the cats with bits of tinsel and jolly games of Trip the Ranger Down the basement stairs so I can rustle wrapping paper without fear, but you know how unhelpful he can be when there's work to be done. Still, it's shaping up to be a productive evening.
The Kings snuck off to do his Yule shopping on Saturday while Deana and I slaved away at cookie baking. Deana added a new treat to the cookie marathon this year...chocolate covered oreos! They are delightful! I let the King eat the broken ones, cuz that's the kind of sweetie I am :-)
We are very much looking forward to visiting with you and the Sons this holiday and hope to see Tom and Bill as well. We can make more concrete plans (as "concrete" as our "plans" ever are!) closer to your arrival.
Well, I must begin the wrapping...the sooner begun, the sooner done, or something like that. Perhaps I should get Bilbo to invent a new Old Saying for situations of this type. I do hope your cold is better and you are not too snowbound!
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
Monday, November 24, 2008
Call a Cambulance
My Dearest Corwynne,
I am again flummoxed by the lack of understanding that Leggs has gained over the past six years. Six years!!!!! He was here when the great and powerful Amron was temporarily felled by a heart attack and yet, when Cam suffered the same malady on Thursday night he was still in complete shock. Don’t get me wrong, I too was shocked that yet another of our strong tent raising men would be victim to this, but we are but human, so I have to say he was far more shocked and not a little bit confused.
Leggs was here when my father came and told me how the events unfolded, the details I will now tell you as Leggs heard them in his head.
Amron, “Cam had a heart attack last night.”
Leggs’ head, “These humans make no sense, why is it one organ can have attacks and the others do not. I have watched many hours of the palantir box and never has any one arrived at hospital with a lung attack. Or a bone attack, or a spleen attack, or….(this went on for a while, I will spare you)
Amron, “The ambulance had trouble getting out of the driveway, because of all the snow.”
Leggs’ head, “What!? How is that snow can impede this Bulance of Cam? It should just ride upon the snow like I do.”
Amron, “They put a stint in one of his arteries and he should be fine.”
Leggs’ head, “Into his heart!? Fools, that is the one place you do not want to pierce above all others!” Moment of thought, “Unless this stint is like love, which may safely be placed in the heart….it must be this.”
Does the King still have this sort of difficulty? I realize that they are immortal or at least nearly immortal, but does it then follow that they can have no concept of the frailty of humans….they have fought with humans, they have drunk with humans, and now have both spent six years in close relationships with humans. Am I asking too much that when one of our number is ill, that I get a chance to think about what I can do to help them rather than trying to explain again and again about human anatomy and life expectancy, and that yes, even the Cam-Ron is, despite their Numenorian like strength, human?
Anyway, that is what I have been dealing with since the incident on Thursday. I hope that the King took the news better than Leggs and you got to spend you time sending out good vibes or something else equally druid-like.
I know that I shouldn't be complaining. Leggs is showing his concern in the only way he knows how, which is kind of sweet when it isn't really annoying. And most important of all, Cam is doing well. So, in the end, we will have to pretend that I am not complaining about anything, that I am, instead, simply sharing the story with you as it unfolded.
Your affectionate friend,
Kendrah
PS. Grapes of Wrath---the opera---please tell me you are joking…and if you are not, that you have not gotten tickets for the King. His retelling and resigning of Animal Farm has just ended!
I am again flummoxed by the lack of understanding that Leggs has gained over the past six years. Six years!!!!! He was here when the great and powerful Amron was temporarily felled by a heart attack and yet, when Cam suffered the same malady on Thursday night he was still in complete shock. Don’t get me wrong, I too was shocked that yet another of our strong tent raising men would be victim to this, but we are but human, so I have to say he was far more shocked and not a little bit confused.
Leggs was here when my father came and told me how the events unfolded, the details I will now tell you as Leggs heard them in his head.
Amron, “Cam had a heart attack last night.”
Leggs’ head, “These humans make no sense, why is it one organ can have attacks and the others do not. I have watched many hours of the palantir box and never has any one arrived at hospital with a lung attack. Or a bone attack, or a spleen attack, or….(this went on for a while, I will spare you)
Amron, “The ambulance had trouble getting out of the driveway, because of all the snow.”
Leggs’ head, “What!? How is that snow can impede this Bulance of Cam? It should just ride upon the snow like I do.”
Amron, “They put a stint in one of his arteries and he should be fine.”
Leggs’ head, “Into his heart!? Fools, that is the one place you do not want to pierce above all others!” Moment of thought, “Unless this stint is like love, which may safely be placed in the heart….it must be this.”
Does the King still have this sort of difficulty? I realize that they are immortal or at least nearly immortal, but does it then follow that they can have no concept of the frailty of humans….they have fought with humans, they have drunk with humans, and now have both spent six years in close relationships with humans. Am I asking too much that when one of our number is ill, that I get a chance to think about what I can do to help them rather than trying to explain again and again about human anatomy and life expectancy, and that yes, even the Cam-Ron is, despite their Numenorian like strength, human?
Anyway, that is what I have been dealing with since the incident on Thursday. I hope that the King took the news better than Leggs and you got to spend you time sending out good vibes or something else equally druid-like.
I know that I shouldn't be complaining. Leggs is showing his concern in the only way he knows how, which is kind of sweet when it isn't really annoying. And most important of all, Cam is doing well. So, in the end, we will have to pretend that I am not complaining about anything, that I am, instead, simply sharing the story with you as it unfolded.
Your affectionate friend,
Kendrah
PS. Grapes of Wrath---the opera---please tell me you are joking…and if you are not, that you have not gotten tickets for the King. His retelling and resigning of Animal Farm has just ended!
Thursday, November 20, 2008
That Time of Year
My Dearest Kendrah,
It's that time of year again....the BIG MUSICAL time of year. I've been swamped the past few weeks selling tickets to "Into the Woods." In fact, we sold out the entire run as of yesterday. Now it's dealing with the disappointment of the Sondheim-loving masses who can't get in to see it. In any case, it's a long show and I've been working like twelve hours a day and neglecting the King terribly. Fortunately, he and Faramir have departed for a long-weekend hunting and fishing trip that should keep him form moping about the citadel. He gets so crabby when I'm stuck at work and he can't figure out how to turn on the DVD player! The King has promised to be home on Sunday with fresh venison. Whee! Perhaps you and Leggs could join us for a barbecue...though poor Faramir is still a bit sensitive about bonfires.
I'm glad Leggs is taking an active interest in real-world politics. It's adorable! I love when he gets all excited about a project and just throws himself into it willy-nilly!! (I just described an Elf as willy-nilly! I'm gonna pay for that later) The King seems quite pleased with the way things turned out. He's thinks that a young, forward-thinking president who reads Harry Potter might be more willing to enter into trade agreements with imaginary worlds than the previous administrations. I told him not to get his hopes up.
Remember back when we did a musical production of "Animal Farm"? Apparently there is an opera version of "The Grapes of Wrath." I mean, ok, opera is bit different than musical theater, but really? Singing in the Dust Bowl? What are people thinking!
Let's see...what other news...I'm petting Diedre on a regular basis now. The King can't understand why this is such a big deal. Seems the two of them have quite the fantasy life without me, just like he and Robinson. Honestly...sometimes my pets get to spend more time with my imaginary boyfriend than I do!!
All righty, I need to get some work done. I hope all is well with you. If I can make it through this weekend I'll be great! I'm planning to take all of next week off work and spend quality time in the White City teaching Eowyn how to stuff a turkey!
You're Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
PS-the delighted to hear that David Tennant is vacating the TARDIS. There's been more than a little gloating. I try not to let him see my heart ache!
It's that time of year again....the BIG MUSICAL time of year. I've been swamped the past few weeks selling tickets to "Into the Woods." In fact, we sold out the entire run as of yesterday. Now it's dealing with the disappointment of the Sondheim-loving masses who can't get in to see it. In any case, it's a long show and I've been working like twelve hours a day and neglecting the King terribly. Fortunately, he and Faramir have departed for a long-weekend hunting and fishing trip that should keep him form moping about the citadel. He gets so crabby when I'm stuck at work and he can't figure out how to turn on the DVD player! The King has promised to be home on Sunday with fresh venison. Whee! Perhaps you and Leggs could join us for a barbecue...though poor Faramir is still a bit sensitive about bonfires.
I'm glad Leggs is taking an active interest in real-world politics. It's adorable! I love when he gets all excited about a project and just throws himself into it willy-nilly!! (I just described an Elf as willy-nilly! I'm gonna pay for that later) The King seems quite pleased with the way things turned out. He's thinks that a young, forward-thinking president who reads Harry Potter might be more willing to enter into trade agreements with imaginary worlds than the previous administrations. I told him not to get his hopes up.
Remember back when we did a musical production of "Animal Farm"? Apparently there is an opera version of "The Grapes of Wrath." I mean, ok, opera is bit different than musical theater, but really? Singing in the Dust Bowl? What are people thinking!
Let's see...what other news...I'm petting Diedre on a regular basis now. The King can't understand why this is such a big deal. Seems the two of them have quite the fantasy life without me, just like he and Robinson. Honestly...sometimes my pets get to spend more time with my imaginary boyfriend than I do!!
All righty, I need to get some work done. I hope all is well with you. If I can make it through this weekend I'll be great! I'm planning to take all of next week off work and spend quality time in the White City teaching Eowyn how to stuff a turkey!
You're Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
PS-the delighted to hear that David Tennant is vacating the TARDIS. There's been more than a little gloating. I try not to let him see my heart ache!
Wednesday, November 05, 2008
It sounds like the beginning of a joke...
My Dearest Corwynne,
Last night Leggs and I were watching the election coverage. Figuring there were hours left before it would be called I figured it would be safe to flip to Comedy Central, which is what we were watching when the announcement came. Luckily, for me, the comedy didn't end there.
Of course we were very happy with the outcome. Leggs had been re-reading the Handmaid's Tale in preparation for another republican win, so I am sure you can imagine our relief. Anyway, shortly after the announcement there was a bit about who would be running in 2012, at which point Leggs suggested that you and I should take a stab at it. Once I realized he wasn't joking, it just got funnier.
He began citing our foreign relations experience, with the taming of the orcs and the trade agreements with the Easterlings. Then on to our executive experience....your re-orginization of the White City, my experience in building an integrated community from the ground up. Then he got very serious and said that he hoped I would not be offended by the fact that he thought it would be best if you were the top of the ticket instead of me.
I assured him that I was not offended and that he would be correct. Your imaginary executive experience is far more extensive than mine. I couldn't help but laugh, he was so very sincere. But you know that my policy in dealing with imaginaries is to always tell them the truth in the hope that they could one day full intergrate into reality...a fruitless hope in Leggs case, I fear.
So I tried. I reminded him of the Obama/Aryes connection. That our connections, and in many ways, the fact that we are who we are would not be appealing to the voters. Not only is my best friend a druid, but also my running mate...not going to fly. I reminded him how Michelle Obama and Cindy McCain did lots of campaigning...I don't think many people would show up for campaign events where the speaker doesn't actually exsist.
Then I explained that even if we could get the voters to accept these things as normal, I doubted that these writing which, as it turns out, are very easy to find would be printed in newspapers as a testament to our deep seeded psychosis. I tried to explain, that even when people that I know discover these writings my heart pounds in terror that they will not see this as two women with healthy imaginations and extra time on there hands.
By the end of the night I thought I had gotten through to him. He went back to the settlement and I went to bed. This morning, however, I discovered that his plan will not be foiled by logic or facts. I came into my living room to discover that while in the settlement, he had gotten everyone together to start making campaign signs.
I think I will wait a few days before I tackle the point that "S&M in '12" is only going to appeal to a small portion of the voting public. I just don't have the strength today.
Your affectionate friend,
Kendrah
PS. A druid and an atheist enter an election....
Last night Leggs and I were watching the election coverage. Figuring there were hours left before it would be called I figured it would be safe to flip to Comedy Central, which is what we were watching when the announcement came. Luckily, for me, the comedy didn't end there.
Of course we were very happy with the outcome. Leggs had been re-reading the Handmaid's Tale in preparation for another republican win, so I am sure you can imagine our relief. Anyway, shortly after the announcement there was a bit about who would be running in 2012, at which point Leggs suggested that you and I should take a stab at it. Once I realized he wasn't joking, it just got funnier.
He began citing our foreign relations experience, with the taming of the orcs and the trade agreements with the Easterlings. Then on to our executive experience....your re-orginization of the White City, my experience in building an integrated community from the ground up. Then he got very serious and said that he hoped I would not be offended by the fact that he thought it would be best if you were the top of the ticket instead of me.
I assured him that I was not offended and that he would be correct. Your imaginary executive experience is far more extensive than mine. I couldn't help but laugh, he was so very sincere. But you know that my policy in dealing with imaginaries is to always tell them the truth in the hope that they could one day full intergrate into reality...a fruitless hope in Leggs case, I fear.
So I tried. I reminded him of the Obama/Aryes connection. That our connections, and in many ways, the fact that we are who we are would not be appealing to the voters. Not only is my best friend a druid, but also my running mate...not going to fly. I reminded him how Michelle Obama and Cindy McCain did lots of campaigning...I don't think many people would show up for campaign events where the speaker doesn't actually exsist.
Then I explained that even if we could get the voters to accept these things as normal, I doubted that these writing which, as it turns out, are very easy to find would be printed in newspapers as a testament to our deep seeded psychosis. I tried to explain, that even when people that I know discover these writings my heart pounds in terror that they will not see this as two women with healthy imaginations and extra time on there hands.
By the end of the night I thought I had gotten through to him. He went back to the settlement and I went to bed. This morning, however, I discovered that his plan will not be foiled by logic or facts. I came into my living room to discover that while in the settlement, he had gotten everyone together to start making campaign signs.
I think I will wait a few days before I tackle the point that "S&M in '12" is only going to appeal to a small portion of the voting public. I just don't have the strength today.
Your affectionate friend,
Kendrah
PS. A druid and an atheist enter an election....
Tuesday, November 04, 2008
Election and Memory
My Dearest Kendrah,
Well, the King is not dealing very well with this election. First he was VERY confused that no one’s son was running. I thought I had managed to clarify all that for him eight years ago, but apparently he did not retain my careful explanation of the democratic process vs, divine right monarchy.
He’s been glued to CNN all evening trying to make sense of the projections and is eagerly counting down the poll closings, though he doesn’t quite have the hang of the whole multiple time zone thing. He’s not at all convinced that it is really technology and not evil sorcery that is getting the info to us so quickly. You know how he mistrusts the palantir boxes and the little people who live in them. I caught him trying to give McCain a beer earlier…fortunately I stopped him before he poured it on the TV!
I’ve been trying to distract him all evening with Pennsic memories. Like how adorable the kids looked all dressed up in their pirate gear. And how Elven and very serious Arwen was when she went shooting for the first time. He reminisced about the wine tasting and how it was the best one ever! No one got too drunk, there was lots of singing, good shopping afterwards…he even reminded me that I need to actually learn how the verses to “Barrett’s Privateers” go so I don’t have to fake it again. We talked about the food, the yogurt and granola mornings, the beneficent magic of the coffee pot, taco night, Rook smelling like onions after making the soup, the tasty Brussels sprouts. He laughed at the memory of Friar Sam, Rook and Gardner with axes making wood chips and how much fun he had with Amron and Cam commentating on their progress. We smiled at how much music was made and beer was drunk and how good the weather was and how many knights he killed in the field battle. I reminded him how much fun we all had at the Wolgemut concert when he did the Polar Bear Dance and how much your youngest son enjoyed the band.
Sadly, these happy memories distract him only briefly and then he is back to fretting about the election. He once again assured me that if things go badly I could take up permanent residence in the White City and we would never have to worry about reality again, though he would miss the indoor plumbing and central heating. Like Fangorn, we will not be hasty, as it would be a major life style change for both of us, but I’m keeping my options open.
I should go back to the living room. I hear him with the remote flipping back and forth rapidly between CNN, MSN and Fox. And the PA polls will have closed by now. I’d like to check in and see how we’re doing. If he gets too tense, maybe I can get him to help with some cleaning. Having our Samhain this late after all the other Samhains I’ve been through already is taking its toll on my desire to clean, cook or do anything other than drink beer and watch the palantir box. Somehow, I think the threat of housework will keep his nerves to the minimum.
Take care! I look forward to hearing about your trip.
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
Well, the King is not dealing very well with this election. First he was VERY confused that no one’s son was running. I thought I had managed to clarify all that for him eight years ago, but apparently he did not retain my careful explanation of the democratic process vs, divine right monarchy.
He’s been glued to CNN all evening trying to make sense of the projections and is eagerly counting down the poll closings, though he doesn’t quite have the hang of the whole multiple time zone thing. He’s not at all convinced that it is really technology and not evil sorcery that is getting the info to us so quickly. You know how he mistrusts the palantir boxes and the little people who live in them. I caught him trying to give McCain a beer earlier…fortunately I stopped him before he poured it on the TV!
I’ve been trying to distract him all evening with Pennsic memories. Like how adorable the kids looked all dressed up in their pirate gear. And how Elven and very serious Arwen was when she went shooting for the first time. He reminisced about the wine tasting and how it was the best one ever! No one got too drunk, there was lots of singing, good shopping afterwards…he even reminded me that I need to actually learn how the verses to “Barrett’s Privateers” go so I don’t have to fake it again. We talked about the food, the yogurt and granola mornings, the beneficent magic of the coffee pot, taco night, Rook smelling like onions after making the soup, the tasty Brussels sprouts. He laughed at the memory of Friar Sam, Rook and Gardner with axes making wood chips and how much fun he had with Amron and Cam commentating on their progress. We smiled at how much music was made and beer was drunk and how good the weather was and how many knights he killed in the field battle. I reminded him how much fun we all had at the Wolgemut concert when he did the Polar Bear Dance and how much your youngest son enjoyed the band.
Sadly, these happy memories distract him only briefly and then he is back to fretting about the election. He once again assured me that if things go badly I could take up permanent residence in the White City and we would never have to worry about reality again, though he would miss the indoor plumbing and central heating. Like Fangorn, we will not be hasty, as it would be a major life style change for both of us, but I’m keeping my options open.
I should go back to the living room. I hear him with the remote flipping back and forth rapidly between CNN, MSN and Fox. And the PA polls will have closed by now. I’d like to check in and see how we’re doing. If he gets too tense, maybe I can get him to help with some cleaning. Having our Samhain this late after all the other Samhains I’ve been through already is taking its toll on my desire to clean, cook or do anything other than drink beer and watch the palantir box. Somehow, I think the threat of housework will keep his nerves to the minimum.
Take care! I look forward to hearing about your trip.
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
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