Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Hard Times Come Again No More

My Dearest Kendrah,

I am delighted that the crisis has been averted! I was sure that some fancy over-priced imports would placate the masses and now all is once again right with the world. Let me know how the orc tailors work out. I may have a job for them come Pennsic!

The seemed King enjoyed his weeks slumming in the ranks, and has been awfully cranky these past few dealing with all the paper work that accumulated during his adventure. When he's not being grumpy, he;s wandering around reciting bits f poetry to himself. I'm afraid he's trying to compose an epic about the flooded settlement:

Hems were muddied. Harried heroes
In sodden shoes sought dry refuge
'midst thunder's peal and storm's thoughtless
Destruction of dearly bought garments...

He stopped reciting when I snickered. I mean really! It's not the fall of Numenor we're talking about here! At least he's taking a more Rohirric approach to composition. I shudder to think what it would sound like in one of those complex Elven rhyme schemes! Still, I hate to mock his creative impulses. Writing poetry is surely a safer hobby than huntng orc!

Well, I must be off. I still need to print tickets for tonight's show.

Your Affectionate Friend,

PS-You were right! I DID have a lovely time on my camping trip!

Friday, September 22, 2006


My Dearest Corwynne,

Your latest letter was greeted with more jubilation than the one announcing the royal wedding. The elves celebrated by smiling, and I am certain I heard someone laugh, but it might have been Gimli. We have been informed that our first shipment of silks should arrive in the next few days and the elves are busy getting the Ork workers into sewing shape. They have had to spend more time than they expected teaching them to thread a needle, but after that it seems to be going well.
Also, plans are now under way for a fashion show. You and the King will be receiving your invitations soon. The elves wanted to get them out by next week, but the MEEMA people were setting up in the building we use to house the printing press, so it will take a while to get that set up again. Speaking of MEEMA. It is such a good thing that we didn't really have an emergency here, because there offerings of second hand clothes and bottled water were taken as an insult and almost caused a completely different riot. Luckily your letter arrived before it could start and the MEEMA people took that as permission to pack up and leave.
All in all, the settlement has suddenly become an almost pleasent place to be. It is nice to take a moment and enjoy the lack of problems on the horizon.

Moment over, time to cook dinner for the boys.
Your affectionate friend,

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Emergency Response

My Dearest Kendrah,

I apologize for not writing sooner but events of recent weeks have kept me busier than a hungry huorn at an orc convention!

First, I am pleased to report that, thanks to our efforts at the Middle Earth Peace Conference, trade routes are again opening to the East and South. (As long as I can keep Celeborn from quoting that 7000 year old dead Elf emperor’s line about how the East brings things only “evil and inelven” we should be fine.)

I regret that MEEMA’s actions during your current crisis were less than could be desired. I hope you and others in the settlement can take comfort in knowing, that although many in the King’s Council felt he did a heck of a job, Amrothos has resigned as MEEMA director. That’s the last time we give a cushy government appointment to Imrahil’s youngest son! He can wander off in errantry like youngest sons did in the good old days and make his own way without government support. (Though I suspect the prince of Dol Amroth has a trust fund set up for the kids somewhere.) While we are currently searching for a suitable replacement, the King has taken matters into his own hands and is managing Settlement relief himself. If you want something done right, get a dunadan to do it! I think he’s enjoying the chance to get his nails dirty and argue with snooty Elves again!

Please assure your residents that silk is on the way! I know that nothing makes an elf grumpier than a sodden hem or a ragged seam! Give them the pep talk about how much the Crown appreciates the work they do, their (fairly) peaceful collaborations with Dwarves and Men, they will not be forgotten, blah, blah, blah...the usual.

Now, I must go sell tickets to our graduate-directed one acts. As soon as that show starts, I plan to take my newly acquired silk thread and tapestry needles and FINALLY go on that camping trip we took almost a year ago. I think I deserve the break, and as you have assured me I will have a good time, I am looking forward to it!

Your Affectionate Friend,

Thursday, September 14, 2006

Floods and Riots

My Dearest Corwynne,

It seems that it falls to me to tell you and the King of the recent occurrences here in the settlement. One of the elder elves had wanted to be the one to tell you of our "woes" but I thought that he might over dramatize the situation because he is one of those who is the most upset.

I will try to start at the beginning. It actually starts back in July. You know that in July my real town flooded and a bit of the excess rain waters seeped into the settlement. I figured, what the heck, it's been dry in Middle Earth this year. Well, two days ago it started raining again, (that would be in the real world again) and I let a bit more seep into Middle Earth. Well, I haven't been sleeping well and I guess I got distracted and sort of let the settlement flood.

Ok, flood might be a bit strong a word for it. But it has turned it to a bit of a bog. Kind of like the bog was that one year at War Practice. Anyway, it isn't a problem except for the clothes. I wrote to you recently about the lack of silks with which to make new clothes and now the hems and tights are getting muddy and the elves are loosing their minds. The insist that the King call in the Middle Earth Emergency Management Agency (MEEMA). I tried to explain that any problems that we have could only be multiplied by their involvement if they are anything like their real world sister agency, but they have insisted that it is either MEEMA, new silks or a full scale elven riot at the mithril gates of the White City.

I think if we could promise silks within a fortnight, they would calm down and neither the riots or MEEMA involvement would be necessary. In fact, I over heard two key members of the leadership here thanking the Valar for sending the floods if it will get them new clothes....They are all so very vain.

So, if you could get some sort of word on the trade negotiations to us soon, I sure it would go a long way to elevating some of the tension.

Your affectionate friend,

P.S. The plus side to all of this is that with all the excitement Leggs has stopped mumbling about his expedition to someplace to do something important. There is always something to be greatful for.

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

A Much Needed Expedition

My Dearest Corwynne,

Who would ever have guessed that our guys were so aware of their surroundings. Everytime I see them when we are out in public they always seem to have an unbelieving glaze over their eyes. As if this is just a dream and soon they will wake up in Middle Earth and everything will be normal again. I never would have guess that that is what they look like when they are concentrating. It is really fascinating.

Anyway, the actual reason I am writing is that we have been hearing rumors in the settlement that the Middle Earth Peace Summit is reaping positive results. I have warned those here who are hoping for silks from the Easterlings, waters from Fangorn and "spices" from Hobbiton, not to get their hopes up, but you know how elves can be when they have gone a long time without new clothes. They have petitioned me to write to you to ascertain if these rumors are true. I hope that they are cause I think they might riot. Of course they don't know that it would take me very little effort to re-imagine the settlement pre-riot, cause what would be the fun in that.
So if you could let us now how the trade negotiations are going it would be very helpful.

Leggs is getting a bit antsy. It seems that two and a half weeks of post pennsic blues are taking their toll and he thinks that he should mount an expedition. He hasn't really been terribly clear on what the expedition would be for or where it might be, just that it needs to be done. You may want to intercept the King's mail from Leggs for a while, just in case he wants him to join him on some fool's errand.

I hope your post pennsic plague is improving. We need you health so that the plans for the royal wedding can begin.

Your affectionate friend,

Monday, September 04, 2006

Notes II

My Dearest Kendrah,

It sounds like your golf experience was quite an adventure. There is probably some lesson about patience involved…there’s usually a lesson about something!

I am pleased to report that I have located another set Aragorn’s Pennsic notes. This latest discovery illustrates my assertion that no one is safe…we are all Blog Fodder! The content of the note is found below.

I hope you enjoyed your holiday weekend. We’ll chat soon!

Your Affectionate Friend,

Note #2 (found rolled up in the bottom of a small pipeweed pouch)

I have noticed over the past several years that a fair amount of lore is shared among the folk of Estmar/Siver Phoenix. Below I have listed a number of seemingly meaningful and/or important stories, questions, reminiscences etc that are oft repeated…actually, repeated every year for as long as I (or the ladies) can remember. I mean to ask Corwynne for explanations of some of this lore, if I can find a way to do it without raising suspicion. I’d hate for her and K to discover what close attention we pay to their “vacation”. We should encourage our folk to write these stories down. Poor Bilbo had to learn the hard way that there is no end of trouble once people start forgetting their stories…

1.”Remember that bag piper at Pennsic III? He was standing on the knoll with the mist rising…?” (repeated by everyone who attended Pennsic III)

2. “What do we do with the camp fund beside buy firewood? We should really talk about it this year" (Keeli)

3. “Those firewood people make their living off of Pennsic…Fair prices though…?” (Lord Amron)

4. “We’ve got eight, maybe nine more tents to get in here…”( Everybody!!)

5. ”Your not just a mother, you’re a MOM!” (C. to K in memory of the creepy sqatting man who was fascinated by Brennan in a Basket)

6. “Let’s watch for falling stars and make fun of Maggie for not seeing them!” (Everyone around the fire)

7. “It’s going to be tight…how many more tents do we need to get in here?” (Everybody)

8. I swear, next year, we taking all our land!” (Lord Michael)

9. “When is Robyn getting in?” (Everybody at some point. Must ascertain just who this 'Robyn' is)

10. "Kate is 18, but this is her 19th Pennsic!"

11."Does that PortaJohn smell like grape Hubba Bubba juice?" (This statement made Elder turn an interesting shade of green. Must research further)

12. “You know, this used to be the archery field”

13. “We’ve got six, maybe seven more tents to fit in here”

14. "Remember when the tornado came and picked up the tent full of beer and my mom and Gregor almost got crushed to death when the pavilion collapsed?” (Kendrah)

15. “There weren’t enough potatoes in that song!” (Torin)

16. “Good morning to YOU!!!”

17. "This is a stupid hobby"