Monday, December 19, 2005

The Horse and Rider...Finally!

My Dearest Corwynne,
I was surprised early this morning by the sound of an approaching horse and rider, (Now Theoden can stop wondering as to their whereabouts.) The rider brought word from Leggs and the orc hunting party. They have come across a group of uruk-hai which should serve our purposes nicely.
Apparently there was a process for the assignment of Uruk-hai jobs consisting of two tests. When born(hatched) if you(an Uruk-hai) immediately killed the nearby orc, you were sent into the army: if you began life by trying to clean the nearby orc and extolled the virtues of flossing, you were sent into Orthanc to the Cleaning Squad. The second test was to take a newly hatched Uruk-hai and tell him that "he would soon taste manflesh". If he responded with a war cry, he was sent to the army. If he responded by jumping up and down clapping his hands like Rudy Galindo....You guessed it....Cleaning Squad.
It seems that several of the Cleaning Uruk-hai were still living in what remains of the forest of Fangorn waiting for someone to bring them their promised "manflesh".
I have been told to not be fooled by the title "Cleaning Squad." They can tend to any manner of household tasks, from cleaning to sewing to lifting heavy objects, and they have no objection to cleaning the litter box. Sarumon's tailor is among them...Invented that fabric of many colors we have heard so much about. I think their services will be in high demand once word of their existence gets out.
The boys found about twenty in their forest home which sounded much like the Ewok village in Star Wars. They will be bring four here and four to the White City before Christmas. The others are being guarded by the extras until we have need of them.
I keep seeing a picture of an Amish barn raising in my head with the only difference being the substitution of Uruk-hai for Amish farmers and it makes me snicker.
So that seems to be all the news from the settlement. Hope all is well in the White City and that your Holiday goes well.

Your affectionate friend,

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

And They're Off!

My Dearest Kendrah,

I am so pleased the quest idea worked! Aragorn was so exciting to have the opportunity to hunt Orcs again with Legolas and Gimli. We had one bad moment when he went looking for that ratty old green Fellowship shirt and found it stuffed in the bottom of my rag-bag. He dug it out, had it mended and insisted on wearing it. I made sure he wore a nice warm tunic over it. It's cold in the mountains! I also taught him about the miracles of CampDry, so hopefully he won't go through so many socks this quest.

Things are quiet here in the White City, which is good, since work is crazy. Nothing like a Tony-nominated musical to bring Pittsburgh to the theatre. Faramir and Eowyn left this morning with a wain and some more extras to gather Yule greens for decorating the Great Hall. Unfortunately, that leaves Imrahil in charge. He's not too keen on the notion of a Christmas tree...afraid it might steal some significance or honour or something from the White Tree. Or worse, attempt to impose some sort of Christian metaphor onto a simple fairy story. I think he's just bitter because he can't have twinkle lights. So, to avoid Imrahil and the hordes of bluehairs howling for tickets, I plan to spend a lot of time in the settlement. Mabe we can finalize our holiday plans.

Any idea when the boys might be back? I'm hoping Aragorn will be able to help me haul my Christmas decorations out of the basement. And I think your father is planning to bring me my couch on the the 17th. I know Aragorn would like to see him, since he missed Samhain.

I'm working nights all this week, but perhaps we can chat late, or Sunday...we'll see. Hope all is well!

Your Affectionate Friend,