Monday, December 19, 2005

The Horse and Rider...Finally!

My Dearest Corwynne,
I was surprised early this morning by the sound of an approaching horse and rider, (Now Theoden can stop wondering as to their whereabouts.) The rider brought word from Leggs and the orc hunting party. They have come across a group of uruk-hai which should serve our purposes nicely.
Apparently there was a process for the assignment of Uruk-hai jobs consisting of two tests. When born(hatched) if you(an Uruk-hai) immediately killed the nearby orc, you were sent into the army: if you began life by trying to clean the nearby orc and extolled the virtues of flossing, you were sent into Orthanc to the Cleaning Squad. The second test was to take a newly hatched Uruk-hai and tell him that "he would soon taste manflesh". If he responded with a war cry, he was sent to the army. If he responded by jumping up and down clapping his hands like Rudy Galindo....You guessed it....Cleaning Squad.
It seems that several of the Cleaning Uruk-hai were still living in what remains of the forest of Fangorn waiting for someone to bring them their promised "manflesh".
I have been told to not be fooled by the title "Cleaning Squad." They can tend to any manner of household tasks, from cleaning to sewing to lifting heavy objects, and they have no objection to cleaning the litter box. Sarumon's tailor is among them...Invented that fabric of many colors we have heard so much about. I think their services will be in high demand once word of their existence gets out.
The boys found about twenty in their forest home which sounded much like the Ewok village in Star Wars. They will be bring four here and four to the White City before Christmas. The others are being guarded by the extras until we have need of them.
I keep seeing a picture of an Amish barn raising in my head with the only difference being the substitution of Uruk-hai for Amish farmers and it makes me snicker.
So that seems to be all the news from the settlement. Hope all is well in the White City and that your Holiday goes well.

Your affectionate friend,

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