Sunday, April 19, 2009

Eons of Silence

My Dearest Corwynne,

I am so sorry for my long silence. The past few months have taken me by surprise in their length and their lack of interesting events. My Great Matter has been solved...sort of. I know that I understand it has ended, however the other part seems to be taking the same stance as the secondary party in the original great matter...I just hope that things do not have a similar ending to the original.

Anyway, on to far more important things...Your Birthday!!! I just came home from your surprise party at the settlement. I am so sorry we had to use a ruse of a crisis with the dwarfs and the new gates for the White City to get you there, but you schedule is very hard to work around. The dress you were wearing does however, lead me to believe that you had an inkling...unless that is the sort of thing the future queen must wear while riding through the countryside on official business, but it seemed to be more of a party dress than a riding dress to us simple folk in the settlement. :)

I hope that you were surprise at least that all the shire folk were able to attend. I was very surprised that Elijah, Dom, Billy, and Sir Ian Sir Ian Sir Ian were there. There was much drama over whether or not they would be able to get the appropriate visa's needed by the Department of Middle Earth Security these days. They seem to be getting more and more strict as each age passes. I don't think the boats from the West could travel back now if they tried!

I am sure you noticed the lack of Orli. Things between him and Leggs are stressed again. And I must admit that I am partly to blame. Me and Ricky Gervais together. You see, I was watching Extras while I was stripping my kitchen floor while the sons were at their father's over Spring Break. Orli is the guest star in one episode and he is "acting" as if he is very self centered and can't believe it is possible for anyone to not find him attractive. He is also very hard on Johnny Depp. Well, Leggs was visiting at the time and he hit the roof.

Apparently, Orli and Leggs had an agreement that Leggs would tolerate him at official functions if he maintained an air of self respect in public. I explained that he was in fact acting in the show, simply doing his job. Leggs feels that just because he is an actor and it was a palantir box show doesn't mean he was acting at all. That Orli had broken their agreement by allowing the masses to see how he truly is. In the end, it was just best not to invite him, and no one seemed to be missing him.

One bit of reality news to share. My great grandfather has been mentioned in yet another book. This one is called In the Wake of the Butcher and amazingly has nothing what ever to do with the mafia! Apparently there was a serial killer in Cleveland in the 40's called the Cleveland Torso Murder and my great grandfather was the police sergeant who found severed head number four. So it looks like my love of the morbid could have been caused by some sort of genetic memory...probably not, but I'm gonna go with that anyway.

Well, with that, I hope you had a good time at the party and that you have a lovely birthday.

Your affectionate friend,

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