My Dearest Corwynne,
I am so glad that you and the King got to spend some quality time together. I am a bit surprised by what movies he did and did not like, but they do say you can never really know someone. And I guess that is the case here.
News from this part of the world (middle earth and reality) is not terribly exciting. The most interesting thing happened in reality(at least I think it was in reality, but after you see how it went, you will understand my hesitation in commenting to that fully).
This evening I attended parent teacher conferences for the eldest of the sons. Nothing out of the ordinary with his school work, just as I expected. As I was about to leave however, one of his teachers said that there was a issue that they wanted to mention. I said okay and waited, expecting something like "He tends to yell "pickles" a lot." (Cause he does.) The two teachers look to each other and braced themselves and the one said, "We would like to discuss your ridiculous facilitation of his unicorn fantasies."
I figured this issue would come up eventually, but I didn't expect it right then. If I had know it was coming I never would have let Leggs tag along. I was distracted for a moment, because Leggs immediately stood up straighter, as sure sign of elf agitation. Since I was distracted, all I managed was "what about it?" And can I just say right now that this was not the right response, because it opened up a window in which these two women let flow forth redneckness (yes, I made that word up cause there isn't one that I know that convey my feeling better) that shocked, awed and offended me (and Leggs) greatly.
They started off by telling me that I was laying the foundation for future mental instability.* I replied to this with "I certainly don't believe that to be true." The rebuttal from the teachers was that I must tell him there is no such things as unicorns. I replied that I would not and that even if I did he wouldn't believe me. one teacher then said to the other, "Well, that is a parenting problem."** And without allowing me time to answer the other teacher began telling me a little story. It stars my eldest child being picked on for believing in unicorns by the other nonbelievers in the class. And how she came to his rescue with this golden nugget..."So, I told them," she said, "that there were unicorns in the Bible, so they must have been real."***
At this point I explained that the son and I had discussed keeping his love of unicorns quiet at school in order to make more friends, but that he said he didn't want that kind of friend. I told them if they had an arguement that could beat that I would be happy to hear it....they only responded that it was very Montessori of me.**** I did not yell, because it is never a good idea to upset the people who spend more time with your child than you do. So, yet another eventful parent teacher conference, and by successful I mean that I don't think this school will ask me to be president of the PTA...thank the Valar!
And that is all the news that is fit to print. The news that is not fit to print can be found below. Give my best to the King.
Your affectionate friend,
Kendrah
Leggs' responses at Parent Teacher conferences.
*These women have clearly not done any research on what causes these mental issues. The New England Journal of Medicine clearly explains that mental illness is caused by many factors. Genetics play a large role as does the patients family life. If they do not feel safe around their family, a mental disorder could arise. I would think that being willing to openly admit to such an unpopular idea at such a young age proves that this child feels completely safe in his home environment. There are also psychological factors, such as trauma....(at this point I had to go back to listening to the teachers or they would have thought that there was a very good reason that my son was crazy!)
**There is a fell voice on the air! If I did not see them with my own eyes I would be sure they were Crebain from Dunland. How is it that they dare?!
***Crebain from Dunland are more intelligent than these women. She proves that the fantasy is not real with the proof that is real from another more fantastic and unbelievable fantasy than the first. The lack of logic in these people would make Spock's head spin!
****Montessori!!! Yes, when my father is finally in the Elven retirement home we will have enough gold to send both of the sons to a real school, like this woman says a Montessori school. I have had enough. Let us be done with these fools.
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Tuesday, February 05, 2008
Movies with the King
My Dearest Kendrah,
I can’t believe it’s been a month since you last wrote! January fled like an Elf on a fast boat to the West! I guess it’s taken me a while to recover from all the holiday festivities and some kind of routine again. And the post-holiday funk was almost equal to the post-Pennsic funk, so I haven’t been in a communicating kind of mood.
Mostly, the King has been hanging out at my place. He has a soft spot for central heating and the electric blanket, so he was perfectly willing to lie around for a few weeks with me watching movies and eating leftover cookies, Hershey’s Miniatures and those funny Italian nougat candies you can only find at Christmas.
Anyway, the eating, as usual was pretty good, but apparently the King is far worse than we when it comes to making fun of...uh…discussing films.
Where to begin. Let’s start with 300. I thought he’d love it, all that manly camaraderie. He spent the whole movie loudly voicing his disapproval at the lack of Spartan armor and couldn’t understand why I was so…ummm…appreciative. “You make fun of me for not wearing a HELM, yet you approve of these muscle-heads going to die in their small clothes?!?!?!” (maybe Boromir was barking up the wrong tree after all!)
Then on to Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End. He couldn’t follow the plot, but you can’t blame him, there are few who could. He spent this movie blathering about how COOL Geoffrey Rush/Barbossa was. What a snappy dresser and oooh…look at his “sword play!” (I may have lost the ground I gained during 300!) At least we both got to make fun of Orlando’s relatively poor overall performance (I’m pretty sure he was talking about his acting….)
Eastern Promises was a fiasco. He can’t understand why Viggo would play such morally ambiguous character. Or why any of the people in the movie were allowed to live. (“If I were King of England, I’d put a stop to that behavior immediately!”). He remains impressed with Viggo’s fighting skills, but the steam room scene made him flinch! Boys are so sensitive about some things! I explained that Viggo received several award nominations for that role and he was appalled that anyone would reward that type of behavior. We had to have another little chat about the difference between actors and their roles. (Every time I think he gets it, I realize he doesn’t…quite.) I told him it was a very big deal for Viggo and he sent a congratulatory fruit basket to be supportive, even though he doesn’t approve. I think that’s very open-minded of him.
I’ve started watching season three of Dr. Who, but only after the King retires for the night. The love I feel for DTD remains strong, but will forever be unrequited.
I should go and watch some Torchwood. I wonder what the King will think of that!!!
Hope all is well and that I hear from you soon.
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
I can’t believe it’s been a month since you last wrote! January fled like an Elf on a fast boat to the West! I guess it’s taken me a while to recover from all the holiday festivities and some kind of routine again. And the post-holiday funk was almost equal to the post-Pennsic funk, so I haven’t been in a communicating kind of mood.
Mostly, the King has been hanging out at my place. He has a soft spot for central heating and the electric blanket, so he was perfectly willing to lie around for a few weeks with me watching movies and eating leftover cookies, Hershey’s Miniatures and those funny Italian nougat candies you can only find at Christmas.
Anyway, the eating, as usual was pretty good, but apparently the King is far worse than we when it comes to making fun of...uh…discussing films.
Where to begin. Let’s start with 300. I thought he’d love it, all that manly camaraderie. He spent the whole movie loudly voicing his disapproval at the lack of Spartan armor and couldn’t understand why I was so…ummm…appreciative. “You make fun of me for not wearing a HELM, yet you approve of these muscle-heads going to die in their small clothes?!?!?!” (maybe Boromir was barking up the wrong tree after all!)
Then on to Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End. He couldn’t follow the plot, but you can’t blame him, there are few who could. He spent this movie blathering about how COOL Geoffrey Rush/Barbossa was. What a snappy dresser and oooh…look at his “sword play!” (I may have lost the ground I gained during 300!) At least we both got to make fun of Orlando’s relatively poor overall performance (I’m pretty sure he was talking about his acting….)
Eastern Promises was a fiasco. He can’t understand why Viggo would play such morally ambiguous character. Or why any of the people in the movie were allowed to live. (“If I were King of England, I’d put a stop to that behavior immediately!”). He remains impressed with Viggo’s fighting skills, but the steam room scene made him flinch! Boys are so sensitive about some things! I explained that Viggo received several award nominations for that role and he was appalled that anyone would reward that type of behavior. We had to have another little chat about the difference between actors and their roles. (Every time I think he gets it, I realize he doesn’t…quite.) I told him it was a very big deal for Viggo and he sent a congratulatory fruit basket to be supportive, even though he doesn’t approve. I think that’s very open-minded of him.
I’ve started watching season three of Dr. Who, but only after the King retires for the night. The love I feel for DTD remains strong, but will forever be unrequited.
I should go and watch some Torchwood. I wonder what the King will think of that!!!
Hope all is well and that I hear from you soon.
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
Sunday, January 06, 2008
Another New Year Comes
My Dearest Corwynne,
I was so pleased to hear of the blessed event. I guess since the media in the real world only has the memory of a fruit fly, I had not heard anything about it. What a joy it will be to see the struggles of the people of Middle Earth recognized by the masses yet again.
Don't get me wrong...news of a royal birth would have been just as welcome. But you and the King have decided to take you time and we will all, most of us anyway, respect that.
I conveyed your warning to Leggs, and he is most distressed. He had hoped that with the success that Orli has seen over the past few years that his name would not be tarnished by association anymore, but he understands that he can't control every thing and that he is immortal, so he will out live the shame.
It was so lovely to see you over the holidays. I cannot believe that with five days scheduled for our visit that we ended up not having enough time to do everything we had planned. Soon it will be new year's month instead of new year's day, if we are to get everything done!
I enjoyed my time there so very much. I had forgotten what it is like to be around actual people. I am lucky enough to keep in touch with many of my friends via the "handheld palantir" but what a difference it is to talk to people and actually see their faces.
We were such social butterflies, which I know is not exactly a change for you, but my goodness, we sure saw a lot of people. Dinner at Gardner and Kathryn's followed by country music Karaoke was quite a surprise. I also really enjoy watching Mai as she plays with Arwen(the good one) and the Sons. I think it shows us how the next regime will run.
The only disappointment of the weekend was Sweeny Todd but at least we got to order our tickets with the flourish of a Roman town crier. Well, I also don't think I got enough use out of my eatin' dress this year, but there is always next year. I think it will be my goal to put on 40 pounds while I am there this time.
I hope that you had as much fun as I did. And be sure to thank the King for my Christmas gift. I have hung it in a place of honor befitting it's rarity and fineness. Best to those in the White City.
Your affectionate friend,
Kendrah
I was so pleased to hear of the blessed event. I guess since the media in the real world only has the memory of a fruit fly, I had not heard anything about it. What a joy it will be to see the struggles of the people of Middle Earth recognized by the masses yet again.
Don't get me wrong...news of a royal birth would have been just as welcome. But you and the King have decided to take you time and we will all, most of us anyway, respect that.
I conveyed your warning to Leggs, and he is most distressed. He had hoped that with the success that Orli has seen over the past few years that his name would not be tarnished by association anymore, but he understands that he can't control every thing and that he is immortal, so he will out live the shame.
It was so lovely to see you over the holidays. I cannot believe that with five days scheduled for our visit that we ended up not having enough time to do everything we had planned. Soon it will be new year's month instead of new year's day, if we are to get everything done!
I enjoyed my time there so very much. I had forgotten what it is like to be around actual people. I am lucky enough to keep in touch with many of my friends via the "handheld palantir" but what a difference it is to talk to people and actually see their faces.
We were such social butterflies, which I know is not exactly a change for you, but my goodness, we sure saw a lot of people. Dinner at Gardner and Kathryn's followed by country music Karaoke was quite a surprise. I also really enjoy watching Mai as she plays with Arwen(the good one) and the Sons. I think it shows us how the next regime will run.
The only disappointment of the weekend was Sweeny Todd but at least we got to order our tickets with the flourish of a Roman town crier. Well, I also don't think I got enough use out of my eatin' dress this year, but there is always next year. I think it will be my goal to put on 40 pounds while I am there this time.
I hope that you had as much fun as I did. And be sure to thank the King for my Christmas gift. I have hung it in a place of honor befitting it's rarity and fineness. Best to those in the White City.
Your affectionate friend,
Kendrah
Wednesday, December 26, 2007
The Blessed Event
My Dearest Kendrah,
First off, I am NOT pregnant. Do you hear that Gladdders?! Not pregnant! Aragorn needs an heir, I need a ring on my finger, that's the way that goes. Maybe you should start harrassing HIM about a princeling, Little Miss Queen of the Golden Wood!
Whew! Sorry about that. Looks like I just unrepressed a bit of here-to-fore repressed anger!
Anyway, the blessed event to which I refer is the reconciliation between PJ and New Line that will allow the Hobbit movie to happen! I meant write sooner, but the paparazzi have begun pursuing us with renewed vigor, this time looking for our reactions to the news. Even poor Eowyn got swarmed by the pap menace. (fortunately we were able to settle the assault charges out of court. Never sneak up on a Shield Maiden of Rohan!) The King, Faramir and I have been busy dealing with the legalities of thing. Mayor Sam will of course need to be involved, especially if they want to do any on location filming. And the Dwarves! I shudder think what those contract negotiations will entail!
Rumor has it Orlando may be approached for a cameo, so Leggs should be prepared with a statement, just in case. Gandalf is fussing that he wants Sir Ian back and is threatening to withold permission to use his name and image if McKellan does not reprise his role. I hate it when wizards fuss...it's the "quick to anger" bit that always makes me tense when meddling in Maiar affairs. The King is quite pleased with the decision to make the film, and likes to think his intervention had something to do with it. He plans to pop over for a visit with PJ and New Line to aid in the selection of a director (whether they want his input or not!)
Otherwise, all is well. Yule (here and in the White City) and Christmas have all gone off with out a hitch. The king and I are looking forward to your upcoming visit with great anticipation.
I hope all is well with you and that the Sons received all they wanted from Santa, or Father Christmas, or Yule father or whatever we're calling him these days.
See you soon.
Your Affectionate friend,
Corwynne
First off, I am NOT pregnant. Do you hear that Gladdders?! Not pregnant! Aragorn needs an heir, I need a ring on my finger, that's the way that goes. Maybe you should start harrassing HIM about a princeling, Little Miss Queen of the Golden Wood!
Whew! Sorry about that. Looks like I just unrepressed a bit of here-to-fore repressed anger!
Anyway, the blessed event to which I refer is the reconciliation between PJ and New Line that will allow the Hobbit movie to happen! I meant write sooner, but the paparazzi have begun pursuing us with renewed vigor, this time looking for our reactions to the news. Even poor Eowyn got swarmed by the pap menace. (fortunately we were able to settle the assault charges out of court. Never sneak up on a Shield Maiden of Rohan!) The King, Faramir and I have been busy dealing with the legalities of thing. Mayor Sam will of course need to be involved, especially if they want to do any on location filming. And the Dwarves! I shudder think what those contract negotiations will entail!
Rumor has it Orlando may be approached for a cameo, so Leggs should be prepared with a statement, just in case. Gandalf is fussing that he wants Sir Ian back and is threatening to withold permission to use his name and image if McKellan does not reprise his role. I hate it when wizards fuss...it's the "quick to anger" bit that always makes me tense when meddling in Maiar affairs. The King is quite pleased with the decision to make the film, and likes to think his intervention had something to do with it. He plans to pop over for a visit with PJ and New Line to aid in the selection of a director (whether they want his input or not!)
Otherwise, all is well. Yule (here and in the White City) and Christmas have all gone off with out a hitch. The king and I are looking forward to your upcoming visit with great anticipation.
I hope all is well with you and that the Sons received all they wanted from Santa, or Father Christmas, or Yule father or whatever we're calling him these days.
See you soon.
Your Affectionate friend,
Corwynne
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
Decorating and Babies
My Dearest Corwynne,
It seems that, I too, have been remiss in my correspondence. I have nothing like you excuses. Simple laziness is all I have to blame it on.
I am glad to hear that your time with the Elves was restful (mostly) and overjoyed that it has not yet become permanent. I am sorry that you had such trouble with the press. I saw some of their renderings and I do not think they did you justice. Of course, the one of Gladders leaving the restroom in the middle of the night is priceless. We framed our copy and it is above the mantle in our settlement house.
Speaking of the settlement, it has been a very long time since I updated you on the construction around here. The home that Leggs and I share is complete. We even added a room for the sons in case they ever manage the intricacies of reality jumping. It is quite cozy and I enjoy my time there very much. The settlement as a whole is also pretty much complete. I say pretty much because it was finished until Leggs jumped back to the settlement after watching HGTV at my house.
So now it is the decoration phase of the construction. And I have to say it is getting a bit strange. The current plan for our meeting hall is to make it look like an opium den. Words cannot express my disappointment at this. Oh well, elves will be elves and you know how they love the drama.
Leggs and I greatly enjoyed you Samhain party. It was so nice to see everyone again. I thought it was very amusing that people have thought that I could see the King in this reality. When Rhyannon arrived and asked if he was there and I had to ask you, she seemed to be even more confused by this than most people are about the whole reality jumping thing in the first place. Either way it was nice to have her there, except....well, Leggs is completely in love with her daughter, the benevolent dictator. He wants us to have a baby. Luckily, when I expressed consern that while pregnant the baby would only be with me in one reality or the other and how we did not know what effect this might have on a fetus he agreed that it probably isn't a good idea.
I kept having flashes of a womb hanging in mid air with a baby inside...just floating around the settlement. Highly amusing and very unsettling at the same time!
I believe that is all I have to report. Things are quite uneventful around here and in the settlement. I hope that with your shows driving you crazy that things in the White City are peaceful.
Your affectionate friend,
Kendrah
It seems that, I too, have been remiss in my correspondence. I have nothing like you excuses. Simple laziness is all I have to blame it on.
I am glad to hear that your time with the Elves was restful (mostly) and overjoyed that it has not yet become permanent. I am sorry that you had such trouble with the press. I saw some of their renderings and I do not think they did you justice. Of course, the one of Gladders leaving the restroom in the middle of the night is priceless. We framed our copy and it is above the mantle in our settlement house.
Speaking of the settlement, it has been a very long time since I updated you on the construction around here. The home that Leggs and I share is complete. We even added a room for the sons in case they ever manage the intricacies of reality jumping. It is quite cozy and I enjoy my time there very much. The settlement as a whole is also pretty much complete. I say pretty much because it was finished until Leggs jumped back to the settlement after watching HGTV at my house.
So now it is the decoration phase of the construction. And I have to say it is getting a bit strange. The current plan for our meeting hall is to make it look like an opium den. Words cannot express my disappointment at this. Oh well, elves will be elves and you know how they love the drama.
Leggs and I greatly enjoyed you Samhain party. It was so nice to see everyone again. I thought it was very amusing that people have thought that I could see the King in this reality. When Rhyannon arrived and asked if he was there and I had to ask you, she seemed to be even more confused by this than most people are about the whole reality jumping thing in the first place. Either way it was nice to have her there, except....well, Leggs is completely in love with her daughter, the benevolent dictator. He wants us to have a baby. Luckily, when I expressed consern that while pregnant the baby would only be with me in one reality or the other and how we did not know what effect this might have on a fetus he agreed that it probably isn't a good idea.
I kept having flashes of a womb hanging in mid air with a baby inside...just floating around the settlement. Highly amusing and very unsettling at the same time!
I believe that is all I have to report. Things are quite uneventful around here and in the settlement. I hope that with your shows driving you crazy that things in the White City are peaceful.
Your affectionate friend,
Kendrah
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