Thursday, February 14, 2008

Ridiculous Facilitation

My Dearest Corwynne,

I am so glad that you and the King got to spend some quality time together. I am a bit surprised by what movies he did and did not like, but they do say you can never really know someone. And I guess that is the case here.

News from this part of the world (middle earth and reality) is not terribly exciting. The most interesting thing happened in reality(at least I think it was in reality, but after you see how it went, you will understand my hesitation in commenting to that fully).

This evening I attended parent teacher conferences for the eldest of the sons. Nothing out of the ordinary with his school work, just as I expected. As I was about to leave however, one of his teachers said that there was a issue that they wanted to mention. I said okay and waited, expecting something like "He tends to yell "pickles" a lot." (Cause he does.) The two teachers look to each other and braced themselves and the one said, "We would like to discuss your ridiculous facilitation of his unicorn fantasies."

I figured this issue would come up eventually, but I didn't expect it right then. If I had know it was coming I never would have let Leggs tag along. I was distracted for a moment, because Leggs immediately stood up straighter, as sure sign of elf agitation. Since I was distracted, all I managed was "what about it?" And can I just say right now that this was not the right response, because it opened up a window in which these two women let flow forth redneckness (yes, I made that word up cause there isn't one that I know that convey my feeling better) that shocked, awed and offended me (and Leggs) greatly.

They started off by telling me that I was laying the foundation for future mental instability.* I replied to this with "I certainly don't believe that to be true." The rebuttal from the teachers was that I must tell him there is no such things as unicorns. I replied that I would not and that even if I did he wouldn't believe me. one teacher then said to the other, "Well, that is a parenting problem."** And without allowing me time to answer the other teacher began telling me a little story. It stars my eldest child being picked on for believing in unicorns by the other nonbelievers in the class. And how she came to his rescue with this golden nugget..."So, I told them," she said, "that there were unicorns in the Bible, so they must have been real."***

At this point I explained that the son and I had discussed keeping his love of unicorns quiet at school in order to make more friends, but that he said he didn't want that kind of friend. I told them if they had an arguement that could beat that I would be happy to hear it....they only responded that it was very Montessori of me.**** I did not yell, because it is never a good idea to upset the people who spend more time with your child than you do. So, yet another eventful parent teacher conference, and by successful I mean that I don't think this school will ask me to be president of the PTA...thank the Valar!

And that is all the news that is fit to print. The news that is not fit to print can be found below. Give my best to the King.

Your affectionate friend,

Leggs' responses at Parent Teacher conferences.

*These women have clearly not done any research on what causes these mental issues. The New England Journal of Medicine clearly explains that mental illness is caused by many factors. Genetics play a large role as does the patients family life. If they do not feel safe around their family, a mental disorder could arise. I would think that being willing to openly admit to such an unpopular idea at such a young age proves that this child feels completely safe in his home environment. There are also psychological factors, such as trauma....(at this point I had to go back to listening to the teachers or they would have thought that there was a very good reason that my son was crazy!)

**There is a fell voice on the air! If I did not see them with my own eyes I would be sure they were Crebain from Dunland. How is it that they dare?!

***Crebain from Dunland are more intelligent than these women. She proves that the fantasy is not real with the proof that is real from another more fantastic and unbelievable fantasy than the first. The lack of logic in these people would make Spock's head spin!

****Montessori!!! Yes, when my father is finally in the Elven retirement home we will have enough gold to send both of the sons to a real school, like this woman says a Montessori school. I have had enough. Let us be done with these fools.


Kathryn said...

I'm appalled. I really don't know what else to say. Can we smite the misguided teachers, can we please? I wish we lived closer to you. My daughter and your son could join in unicorn and fairy work all the time, she would really appreciate the help, for sure.

Kendrah & Corwynne said...

Smiting!!!! I love smiting. And I am sure if Leggs had thought of it he would have loved to lead the smiting.

So can assume that you have not run into similar problems? Do you suppose that is because you have better teachers or that you have some how managed to not lay the proper ground work for future mental instability?