My Dearest Corwynne,
My goodness, you have been busy lately. Mithrandir mentioned to me that he thought we were "dropping the palantir" a bit with our writings. But I think he was satisfied when I pointed out that the scholars who will be studying our writings have yet to be born, and therefore we would get it done when we could. Hopefully that will keep him off our backs for a while.
I have been wondering if you have managed to keep the upcoming elections out of the eye of the King this time around. I know how upset he gets when the "wrong" person wins, and even though that looks less likely this time, I was wondering if you were letting him have access to the process this time or if you were just going to fill him in after the fact.
I had hoped to keep the election coverage away from Leggs, but sadly I did not succeed. Even though he had not been born at the time of the kinslayings, he is quiet certain that a female vice presidential candidate I will not name is the leader of a small sect of kinslayers who disappeared into our reality when after the slayings received less than stellar reviews. I have asked him several times for more information on this sect of kinslayers, since I have never heard of them, but he just says that the grief is still too near and goes of to lament. You know, his usual cop out.
So I think it is safe to say that Leggs is not a fan of at least half of the republican ticket and I am sure he will be sharing his views with the King soon, so if you have been keeping him away from the election, you may want to also keep him away from Leggs...
In other news, I am off to visit the Loud One for the weekend. We will be attending their famous Samhain event and with the wickerman (will it have firecrackers or not?!?!) and the more famous pig head, I am sure to have much to report. Leggs has opted not to go with me, he is going to stalk the GOP ticket at their rallys this weekend....thank the Valar that they won't be able to see him with his arrows aimed directly at her...cause I don't think Elves fair to well in Gitmo.
Your affectionate friend,
Kendrah
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Monday, October 20, 2008
Work, Witches and a Birthday
My Dearest Kendrah,
It seems like forever since I have written. Things around here have gone crazy the past month...I don't know where the time goes. Maybe it’s another of those “as we get older” things.
Anyway…I don’t have much time. Viggo has decided to pop over to spend part of his 50th birthday with us and the Tower is in an uproar. Apparently he and the King worked it all out but no one bothered to pass the info along to me (typical Men)! So out of the blue this afternoon, the King wanted to know what we’d be serving for the birthday dinner and if the of Old Winyard Mayor Sam has shipped had arrived and being allowed to breathe! Here I was, looking forward a peaceful Monday night after my so-called weekend and BAM! VIP party!
Fortunately the staff in the Citadel is almost as good as the one on Upstairs/Downstairs at pulling off emergency dinner parties, so it looks like we won’t embarrass ourselves in the eyes of our favorite tough-guy-with-a heart-of-gold movie star. But Faramir is gonna freak when he sees what we’re paying in over-time for the kitchen staff! Fortunately, Viggo and the King wanted to keep it a fairly low-key affair, so there was no need to break the formal garb or be too fancy. Which is good…I‘m thinking I might need to retire after dinner and let the guys do some much needed-bonding. The weekend wiped me out!
Saturday, I got up made pierogies, talked to Rook (don’t tell the King, I’d hate for it to get back to Elrond since he’s been so useful to me lately), frieed the pirogies, took a shower, got all dressed up (make-up and everything) and went to my potluck. Sunday I spent like 12 hours at Pagan Pride Day sitting at the Druid table and being friendly and helpful. You how exhausting friendly and helpful can be!! On the plus side, I finished crocheting a dishrag and am halfway through another. There’s a lot of downtime sitting at the Druid table. You can only pass out so much propaganda!!!
Work is hell…we just can’t seem to get caught up! I can’t wait ‘til Thanksgiving break! I plan to spend a great deal of time lounging about the White City letting people wait on me. Of course I have to get through two weeks of a very popular musical first! If Sondheim doesn’t kill me, I now I will be a stronger person for having survived “Into the Woods”, but I think it will require much reflection on my part before I start to see the good in it.
Well, once again time flies. I have to pop over to White City and make sure everything is good to go for the party. Hope all is well with you. Heck, I might see you and Leggs there! I haven’t even glanced at the guest list yet!
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
It seems like forever since I have written. Things around here have gone crazy the past month...I don't know where the time goes. Maybe it’s another of those “as we get older” things.
Anyway…I don’t have much time. Viggo has decided to pop over to spend part of his 50th birthday with us and the Tower is in an uproar. Apparently he and the King worked it all out but no one bothered to pass the info along to me (typical Men)! So out of the blue this afternoon, the King wanted to know what we’d be serving for the birthday dinner and if the of Old Winyard Mayor Sam has shipped had arrived and being allowed to breathe! Here I was, looking forward a peaceful Monday night after my so-called weekend and BAM! VIP party!
Fortunately the staff in the Citadel is almost as good as the one on Upstairs/Downstairs at pulling off emergency dinner parties, so it looks like we won’t embarrass ourselves in the eyes of our favorite tough-guy-with-a heart-of-gold movie star. But Faramir is gonna freak when he sees what we’re paying in over-time for the kitchen staff! Fortunately, Viggo and the King wanted to keep it a fairly low-key affair, so there was no need to break the formal garb or be too fancy. Which is good…I‘m thinking I might need to retire after dinner and let the guys do some much needed-bonding. The weekend wiped me out!
Saturday, I got up made pierogies, talked to Rook (don’t tell the King, I’d hate for it to get back to Elrond since he’s been so useful to me lately), frieed the pirogies, took a shower, got all dressed up (make-up and everything) and went to my potluck. Sunday I spent like 12 hours at Pagan Pride Day sitting at the Druid table and being friendly and helpful. You how exhausting friendly and helpful can be!! On the plus side, I finished crocheting a dishrag and am halfway through another. There’s a lot of downtime sitting at the Druid table. You can only pass out so much propaganda!!!
Work is hell…we just can’t seem to get caught up! I can’t wait ‘til Thanksgiving break! I plan to spend a great deal of time lounging about the White City letting people wait on me. Of course I have to get through two weeks of a very popular musical first! If Sondheim doesn’t kill me, I now I will be a stronger person for having survived “Into the Woods”, but I think it will require much reflection on my part before I start to see the good in it.
Well, once again time flies. I have to pop over to White City and make sure everything is good to go for the party. Hope all is well with you. Heck, I might see you and Leggs there! I haven’t even glanced at the guest list yet!
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
Sunday, September 21, 2008
Like Sweating Sickness
My Dearest Corwynne,
I decided to wait for the full outcome of your story before replying. I figure it is always good to get the whole story before saying anything in order to avoid needing seasoning for one's foot. My original feelings about the King's behavior about DT doctor would have been seen as unkind and could have made things awkward at our next meeting, and I am glad that I waited.
I am also glad, nay, overjoyed that the King has seen the error of his ways. Jealous is not a good quality in a movie boyfriend. Especially when that movie boyfriend understands from wence he came. If you were dating Garth from Wayne's World, I would not expect him to understand where he has come from. But the King has proven time and again that he understands the ins and outs of reality jumping and therefore should also understand the difficulties a woman in reality must face when dating someone from fantasy. It is good that his mind has won out over petty emotions.
That, and I love having DT doctor around. As you know, I am a big fan of his...not as big as you, of course, but from time to time there are moments when I regret not grabbing him up first. But it is truly better that he and I remain friends...I am much better in the Donna role as opposed to Rose or Martha, it just works better for us.
I know that the past few months will be difficult for the future historians of Middle Earth, but I think it will be a welcome one. Much like our long conversations debating what the sweating sickness really was, or whether or not Giaus Baltar is evil, I think they will enjoy the chance for debate amid all the facts. It will give new life to their studies, if fact I think we should consider having one of the Sons (mine, not Elrond's) damage some of the records here and there upon our deaths, just to throw some mystery out there. I am sure that Mithrandir would not approve, but I think we should jazz it up a bit.
Anyway, we have had a pretty quiet summer in the settlement. I have not found any writings of Leggs from Pennsic this year. I suspect he knows that I forwarded it on to you last year. I hope that the King had something to say.
We are looking forward to seeing you next month for Samhain...I have to make something for that....eeeks!
Your affectionate friend,
Kendrah
*all characters from alternate realities other than reality itself and the main fantasy world contained herein were used with the permission of the trans-reality agency.
I decided to wait for the full outcome of your story before replying. I figure it is always good to get the whole story before saying anything in order to avoid needing seasoning for one's foot. My original feelings about the King's behavior about DT doctor would have been seen as unkind and could have made things awkward at our next meeting, and I am glad that I waited.
I am also glad, nay, overjoyed that the King has seen the error of his ways. Jealous is not a good quality in a movie boyfriend. Especially when that movie boyfriend understands from wence he came. If you were dating Garth from Wayne's World, I would not expect him to understand where he has come from. But the King has proven time and again that he understands the ins and outs of reality jumping and therefore should also understand the difficulties a woman in reality must face when dating someone from fantasy. It is good that his mind has won out over petty emotions.
That, and I love having DT doctor around. As you know, I am a big fan of his...not as big as you, of course, but from time to time there are moments when I regret not grabbing him up first. But it is truly better that he and I remain friends...I am much better in the Donna role as opposed to Rose or Martha, it just works better for us.
I know that the past few months will be difficult for the future historians of Middle Earth, but I think it will be a welcome one. Much like our long conversations debating what the sweating sickness really was, or whether or not Giaus Baltar is evil, I think they will enjoy the chance for debate amid all the facts. It will give new life to their studies, if fact I think we should consider having one of the Sons (mine, not Elrond's) damage some of the records here and there upon our deaths, just to throw some mystery out there. I am sure that Mithrandir would not approve, but I think we should jazz it up a bit.
Anyway, we have had a pretty quiet summer in the settlement. I have not found any writings of Leggs from Pennsic this year. I suspect he knows that I forwarded it on to you last year. I hope that the King had something to say.
We are looking forward to seeing you next month for Samhain...I have to make something for that....eeeks!
Your affectionate friend,
Kendrah
*all characters from alternate realities other than reality itself and the main fantasy world contained herein were used with the permission of the trans-reality agency.
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
The Saga continues
My Dearest Kendrah,
Apologies for taking so long to continue my story! I know you (and the eager bards and minstrels) are dying for the rest of the story. In the new-found spirit of reconciliation, I’ve been spending a great deal of time in Minis Tirith being a dutiful consort and haven't had much time to write.
As you can imagine, my outburst to the King did not go over well. Still muttering grimly about the Doctor’s lack of beard he stomped into the bedroom, dragged Anduril from its resting place under the bed (next to the exercise machine I STILL haven’t set up) and announced that he thought we should take a “break.” Well, that was just fine with me. I’m tired of his petty jealousies! Do I complain when he, Faramir and Eomer go off for weeks on one of their “boy’s hunting vacations”? Did I reprimand him when I found the naughty diary entries Boromir left in his journal? Did I complain when he found a way around the web filter and started Google image searching Liv Tyler? No! I did not! So it was decided that I spend my summer dealing with precollege and he would stay in the White City and we could both have “space” to decide where we wanted the relationship to go.
Now, we’ve spent time apart before and no one ever raised a carefully-groomed eyebrow, but apparently this time, the minions of the City knew something was up. Maybe it was lingering trauma over the recent Celeborn/Galadriel fallout but suddenly everyone and his sister-son in Middle Earth knew there was an ISSUE. Oddly enough, Eowyn appeared to be on my side and stayed in touch. (I guess she figured that she knew a thing or two about forbidden love!) Anyway, you may have seen what some of the gossip rags were insinuating! There was the rumor that I was pregnant and insisting on having the baby in a reality hospital. The midwives in the Housing of Healing were pissed about that one! There the theory that I had gone to live with the Elves. (Nice thought!) and my favorite…I was secretly an agent of the Dark Lord and had run off to the Easterlings carrying with me the defense secrets of all of Gondor! (Like they needed MY help to make a mess of the Gondor! We're still cleaning up after their last invasion!)
The King did nothing to dispel any of the rumors. Apparently royal pride wouldn’t allow him to tell any reputable reporter the truth, so it was easier to let folks speculate. Things turned around when word of the Break reached Rivendell. While I was busy trying to get precollege over with and packing for Pennsic, Eowyn sent a Rider to tell me that the King had been summoned by Lord Elrond and that he had departed for Imladris with all due haste. Most folks assumed it was new Orc colony in need of smiting or that Elrond had finally decided to make the King get all his crap out of his old bedroom. As it turns out, Elrond was most displeased to learn of our spat. Word that the King might once again be the most eligible bachelor in Arda set off quite a flurry of concern. Seems his lordship was sure that the King might try and get back together with his old girlfriend the She-elf Who Shall Not Be Named. This was not acceptable.
I don’t what Elrond said to him, but Aragorn showed up Sunday night at Pennsic with a bouquet of elanor and apologized! Privately, of course. No sense everyone knowing what had been going on. Our cover story that he came to Pennsic late because of pressing matters back home seemed to satisfy everyone at the time. Of course, most of them were drunk…Anyhoo…The King has promised to be less scornful of beardless Time Lords and I have promised to be less enthusiastic (at least around him) of the Doctor’s (many) virtues and all is well again. I think he finally understands that TV boyfriends may come and go, but movie boyfriends are forever. (And I showed him some Patrick Troughton and William Hartnell episodes and he felt much better about himself.)
So there it is…a simple lover’s quarrel that worked out okay in the end. I don’t think the King is used to happy endings!
More soon, but I promised Eowyn I’d show her a few David Tennant episode so she could see what all the fuss was about. Let’s hope Faramir takes it better than the King!
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
Apologies for taking so long to continue my story! I know you (and the eager bards and minstrels) are dying for the rest of the story. In the new-found spirit of reconciliation, I’ve been spending a great deal of time in Minis Tirith being a dutiful consort and haven't had much time to write.
As you can imagine, my outburst to the King did not go over well. Still muttering grimly about the Doctor’s lack of beard he stomped into the bedroom, dragged Anduril from its resting place under the bed (next to the exercise machine I STILL haven’t set up) and announced that he thought we should take a “break.” Well, that was just fine with me. I’m tired of his petty jealousies! Do I complain when he, Faramir and Eomer go off for weeks on one of their “boy’s hunting vacations”? Did I reprimand him when I found the naughty diary entries Boromir left in his journal? Did I complain when he found a way around the web filter and started Google image searching Liv Tyler? No! I did not! So it was decided that I spend my summer dealing with precollege and he would stay in the White City and we could both have “space” to decide where we wanted the relationship to go.
Now, we’ve spent time apart before and no one ever raised a carefully-groomed eyebrow, but apparently this time, the minions of the City knew something was up. Maybe it was lingering trauma over the recent Celeborn/Galadriel fallout but suddenly everyone and his sister-son in Middle Earth knew there was an ISSUE. Oddly enough, Eowyn appeared to be on my side and stayed in touch. (I guess she figured that she knew a thing or two about forbidden love!) Anyway, you may have seen what some of the gossip rags were insinuating! There was the rumor that I was pregnant and insisting on having the baby in a reality hospital. The midwives in the Housing of Healing were pissed about that one! There the theory that I had gone to live with the Elves. (Nice thought!) and my favorite…I was secretly an agent of the Dark Lord and had run off to the Easterlings carrying with me the defense secrets of all of Gondor! (Like they needed MY help to make a mess of the Gondor! We're still cleaning up after their last invasion!)
The King did nothing to dispel any of the rumors. Apparently royal pride wouldn’t allow him to tell any reputable reporter the truth, so it was easier to let folks speculate. Things turned around when word of the Break reached Rivendell. While I was busy trying to get precollege over with and packing for Pennsic, Eowyn sent a Rider to tell me that the King had been summoned by Lord Elrond and that he had departed for Imladris with all due haste. Most folks assumed it was new Orc colony in need of smiting or that Elrond had finally decided to make the King get all his crap out of his old bedroom. As it turns out, Elrond was most displeased to learn of our spat. Word that the King might once again be the most eligible bachelor in Arda set off quite a flurry of concern. Seems his lordship was sure that the King might try and get back together with his old girlfriend the She-elf Who Shall Not Be Named. This was not acceptable.
I don’t what Elrond said to him, but Aragorn showed up Sunday night at Pennsic with a bouquet of elanor and apologized! Privately, of course. No sense everyone knowing what had been going on. Our cover story that he came to Pennsic late because of pressing matters back home seemed to satisfy everyone at the time. Of course, most of them were drunk…Anyhoo…The King has promised to be less scornful of beardless Time Lords and I have promised to be less enthusiastic (at least around him) of the Doctor’s (many) virtues and all is well again. I think he finally understands that TV boyfriends may come and go, but movie boyfriends are forever. (And I showed him some Patrick Troughton and William Hartnell episodes and he felt much better about himself.)
So there it is…a simple lover’s quarrel that worked out okay in the end. I don’t think the King is used to happy endings!
More soon, but I promised Eowyn I’d show her a few David Tennant episode so she could see what all the fuss was about. Let’s hope Faramir takes it better than the King!
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
The Infamous Summer of 2008
My Dearest Kendrah,
Years from now, our official biographers will sift through reams of journal entries and letters and wonder what happened during the Summer of 2008 RR (Reality Reckoning). Questions will that keep bards and storytellers busy for centuries pondering the mysteries of that time. Romantic tales will spring up concerning our trials and tribulations, made all the more horrible to bear because we did not have each other as faithful companions. What drove them apart, they wonder and why, after three months of silence, have they reconciled and, renewed in frith and friendship, begun again the glorious adventure of fellowship between the worlds.
Well, screw the biographers and bards!!! The truth is…I was busy!!! Between the Druids (reality) and the King’s jealousy (Fantasy), I’ve had my hands full!!! It is not and issue between us, oh bards, but an issue with the King. An issue that almost changed the course of history. I admit I am partly to blame and to protect his honor and the intimate details of our recent unpleasantness, (damn paparazzi) I have avoided committing to paper the events of the past few months. I know you are aware of some of the rumors and gossip that had spread throughout our realm and beyond, and I hope this letter will explain with a bit more truthiness the situation at hand.
As you know, War Practice went off beautifully! Celeborn was very polite, though he did drink lot, and seemed to enjoy himself, or at least, remain rather bemused by the entire situation. Shortly after our return from War practice though, his Elven Lordship decided it was time to retreat to Lothorien and sped some time contemplating the state of the reality and fate of Man. (He took with him a box of Fruity Cheerios). Huzzah! I thought finally, things would get back to normal around Minis Tirith.
Unfortunately, the new season of Dr. Who began.
I thought the King and I had worked through out issues with my current TV Boyfriend, but apparently I was sadly mistaken. When the season began, I invited the king to watch with me, thinking if we were together he would see that It was all over between me and the Doctor. That ploy backfired! I was not nearly as over the Doctor as I thought (and my added, creepy fascination with Capt. Jack didn’t help.) Maybe it was a seven year itch, maybe I was dreaming of greener pastures, I just don’t know.
I behaved fairly well in the beginning, hiding my forbidden love deep inside like Gwenevere (that twit! I hated myself!), but the King wasn’t enjoying himself. He kept watching, but I had to put up with all the snide comments. “The Doctor! What kind of name is that? And people made fun of ME when I called myself Strider” and “He doesn’t seem very fit. That’s what you get from sitting on your ass riding a blue box through space and time instead of hacking orcs like a real man” and “He’s so skinny. I could snap him like a twig…even Legolas could snap him like a twig, not that he would, I think he has a fondness for twigs, but you know what I’m saying” and “Why doesn’t the sissy boy grow a beard for Eru’s sake, he looks like Hobbit” and on and on.
That was all I could take. I wet on a rant about how the Doctor always has to save the world and if he wants to do it beardless and wearing sneakers that’s his right. And how The King should be lucky to have me…someone to come home to after the long orc hunts who cares about him and who he can actually have sex with from time to time. And he would just spend time with the Doctor he would understand what a wonderful guy he really is. And how the Doctor is doing his part to save the world too and the King should just shut up about it!!!!!
Well, that did not go over too well.
Unfortunately, I must sign off for now. Busy, busy with post Pennsic clean-up (still!) and assorted Gondorian harvest festivals to plan.
I will continue the saga as soon as I am able.
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
Years from now, our official biographers will sift through reams of journal entries and letters and wonder what happened during the Summer of 2008 RR (Reality Reckoning). Questions will that keep bards and storytellers busy for centuries pondering the mysteries of that time. Romantic tales will spring up concerning our trials and tribulations, made all the more horrible to bear because we did not have each other as faithful companions. What drove them apart, they wonder and why, after three months of silence, have they reconciled and, renewed in frith and friendship, begun again the glorious adventure of fellowship between the worlds.
Well, screw the biographers and bards!!! The truth is…I was busy!!! Between the Druids (reality) and the King’s jealousy (Fantasy), I’ve had my hands full!!! It is not and issue between us, oh bards, but an issue with the King. An issue that almost changed the course of history. I admit I am partly to blame and to protect his honor and the intimate details of our recent unpleasantness, (damn paparazzi) I have avoided committing to paper the events of the past few months. I know you are aware of some of the rumors and gossip that had spread throughout our realm and beyond, and I hope this letter will explain with a bit more truthiness the situation at hand.
As you know, War Practice went off beautifully! Celeborn was very polite, though he did drink lot, and seemed to enjoy himself, or at least, remain rather bemused by the entire situation. Shortly after our return from War practice though, his Elven Lordship decided it was time to retreat to Lothorien and sped some time contemplating the state of the reality and fate of Man. (He took with him a box of Fruity Cheerios). Huzzah! I thought finally, things would get back to normal around Minis Tirith.
Unfortunately, the new season of Dr. Who began.
I thought the King and I had worked through out issues with my current TV Boyfriend, but apparently I was sadly mistaken. When the season began, I invited the king to watch with me, thinking if we were together he would see that It was all over between me and the Doctor. That ploy backfired! I was not nearly as over the Doctor as I thought (and my added, creepy fascination with Capt. Jack didn’t help.) Maybe it was a seven year itch, maybe I was dreaming of greener pastures, I just don’t know.
I behaved fairly well in the beginning, hiding my forbidden love deep inside like Gwenevere (that twit! I hated myself!), but the King wasn’t enjoying himself. He kept watching, but I had to put up with all the snide comments. “The Doctor! What kind of name is that? And people made fun of ME when I called myself Strider” and “He doesn’t seem very fit. That’s what you get from sitting on your ass riding a blue box through space and time instead of hacking orcs like a real man” and “He’s so skinny. I could snap him like a twig…even Legolas could snap him like a twig, not that he would, I think he has a fondness for twigs, but you know what I’m saying” and “Why doesn’t the sissy boy grow a beard for Eru’s sake, he looks like Hobbit” and on and on.
That was all I could take. I wet on a rant about how the Doctor always has to save the world and if he wants to do it beardless and wearing sneakers that’s his right. And how The King should be lucky to have me…someone to come home to after the long orc hunts who cares about him and who he can actually have sex with from time to time. And he would just spend time with the Doctor he would understand what a wonderful guy he really is. And how the Doctor is doing his part to save the world too and the King should just shut up about it!!!!!
Well, that did not go over too well.
Unfortunately, I must sign off for now. Busy, busy with post Pennsic clean-up (still!) and assorted Gondorian harvest festivals to plan.
I will continue the saga as soon as I am able.
Your Affectionate Friend,
Corwynne
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